Olivia Ballentine
by Nubia
Summary: Born to a troubled Muggle home, this is the story of one girls struggle to overcome hardships and find her place in the world. To find a way to love. Slight Teddy/Victorie. Eventual Teddy/OC
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, it's not mine.

A/N I know most of you on my alert list are Tamera Pierce fans. But I wanted to give Harry Potter a try. Just so you all know, the story really starts to pick up about Olivia's fourth year, but I wanted to have her first three included in the story for some background. So the first few chappies might be a little bit slow. I don't think so, I think they rock, but let me know. Review me!  
-Nubia

Chapter One: Hogwarts

Olivia Ballentine was not like most of the witches and wizards scurrying through King's Cross Station. She came to this realization quite quickly upon their arrival. Since she had been sitting on the tiny bench she had claimed for her own for almost two hours, she had had plenty of time to observe her soon to be fellow students. She hadn't needed that time, not really.

She already knew.

There was something infinately different about her, a knowledge that she possesed that most others did not. A knowledge that she saw when she looekd into her own eyes in the miror. A knowledge that wasn't reflected back at her. However, it was also the kind of knowledge that if one did not posses it, then one also could not recognize it in others. For that reason, Olivia was able to blend in quite well.

If one were to look at her, sitting quite calmly on the bench, the difference between her and the other students would not be immediately apparent. She was dressed nicely in a light blue button down shirt with a brown pleated skirt jus sort of knee length that rested gently at her hips. Her curly black hair was pulled back into a neat pony, the ends curling ever so delicately. Black, thinly framed glasses rested on her nose, a shield for her intense blue eyes. She looked like a respectable young ten year old, albeit slightly mature for her age.

No, the difference was not on the outside for people to see. It was on the inside, where her emotions resided. For while the students and parents buzzed around her with excitement and happiness, regarding their train ride into school as a wonderful new opportunity, as an experience of a lifetime, and all those jolly things, Olivia saw it as something drastically different.

With a sigh, Olivia grabbed firmly onto the trolley that held her one ratty old trunk and pushed herself towards the wall between platforms nine and ten. She had worried for an agonizing ten minutes about the seemingly absence of the gate she was supposed to be at, but then logic had kicked in and she realized the gate must be hidden.

Since she had gone eleven years of her life without knowing that magic existed, it was logical that the magical world was exclusive and open only to those who had been accepted in. They wouldn't blatantly flaunt themselves for just anyone to see. Therefore, the gate must be there, exactly where her admissions letter had stated. There was simply a trick to it, that she had yet to figure out.

Her suspicions had been confirmed when she saw the first odd family walk into the station. She had recognized them immediately as that of a Hogwarts family because their young son had been carrying a trunk much like her own accompanied by a cage with a fluttering owl inside, something she still found curiously strange. That and they had walked through the wall separating the two platforms and apparently disappeared.

Since that first family, Olivia had watched dozens more walk through the wall, had seen proud parents, excited older kids, and scared little boys and girls that looked to be around her age. It hadn't taken a genius to figure out what she needed to do. The reason she hadn't moved from her bench wasn't because she didn't know where to go or how to get to the train.

It was because she was fighting the raging guilt and panic that was eating its way through her insides.

Olivia knew that it was now or never, and not just because the time was rapidly approaching departure. she had pushed her resolve as far as it would go and she needed to get through the gate and onto the train, before she lost her battle with the guilt and she didn't get on at all. She had to. Returning home would only make things so much worse. She had seen it in her mother's eyes. Had felt it in her bones.

With a sigh and a slight wince, Olivia pushed her protesting body up to her feet and walked steadily towards the stonewall. She felt her stomach flutter with nerves and wanted to close her eyes in preparation for pain, for surely she would run right into the stones and fall back on her face. But she forced her eyes to remain open and her pace to remain sure. Her mother's face flashed through her mind again and she resolved that she would face any pain head on. She had to at least have that much courage.

And then she was through and standing on an open platform. The sun was beating down on her sallow face, the heat trying to soak into her cold appendages. Olivia looked wide-eyed at the students around her. The air was noisy with the buzz of goodbyes and warnings to behave. There were so many students Olivia was amazed she was able to see the giant train that puffed steam steadily from behind them.

Since watching the happy families only made her sad, Olivia pushed her way through the crowd and towards the train. She watched a father stow the trunks on the train with easy strength and did the same before climbing in and heading down its length looking for an empty compartment.

It was easy finding an empty seat as most of the students were still mingling on the deck outside. She had her pick and decided to pick a seat on the side that faced away from the platform. Landscape was a much safer backdrop for her thoughts. When Olivia had decided that she wasn't like the other kids coming to Hogwarts this year, she hadn't been lying.

When Olivia had first received her owl with the letter welcoming her to Hogwarts, she had been intrigued. At first she had thought it was a private school within her area. Since she hadn't fit in at public school, due to her own choice of actions, she had assumed that going to a private school would be a good change. At a private school, it would be easier to hide away the bruises and the periodic panic. It would be easier to pretend she was too focused on studying to make friends. It would be that much easier to hide.

But upon showing her mother the letter, she came to the conclusion that she had been wrong. Hogwarts was not a private school within her area. It was a school for witchcraft and wizardry, something she hadn't thought existed and was still slightly sceptacal about. Her mother, however, was a firm and terrified believer. Olivia could still remember the look on her mother's face.

Her eyes, so big in her already sunken face, had seemed to widen even further, swallowing all the other features until it seemed she was two painfully blue eyes surrounded by dirty brown hair.

"Where did you get this Olivia?" Her mother's voice had faltered at the end, almost unable to say her daughter's name. They were seated at the kitchen table, the lights dim, the noise of the food cooking on the stove muted. It wouldn't be right for loud noises, not if they wanted the monster to wake.

"It came through the window. With an owl," Olivia whispered, suddenly scared. The sight of an owl hadn't startled her, though she had been curious as to why it had come to her and not her mother. She had seen a few owls in her lifetime, only when her mother's husband had been out to sea though. The sight of them always seemed to put her mother in a better mood. Why now was it different?

"I had hoped it wouldn't come to this," her mother whispered, and to Olivia's horror, she saw tears flood her mother's blue eyes, magnified by the fact that they were so wide within her thin face. The sight of them squeezed Olivia's heart in the most painful way.

"What is it mommy?" Olivia whispered in her child's voice, coming around the table to kneel at her mother's side. She grabbed one of her hands, wanting to comfort, wanting to heal, to sooth. Her hands were skin and bones, and shaking so violently it was a wonder Olivia hadn't seen. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, dearest. Of course nothings wrong. This is good news. Very good news indeed. We should celebrate," Her voice broke on a sob and Olivia felt tears pinch at her own eyes.

"No!" Olivia said a little too loudly and watched her mother's eyes dart fearfully to the kitchen's door before settling back on her daughter's lovely face. "No, I don't want to celebrate. This isn't good news, is it? This is something bad. Something terribly bad. He isn't going to like this is he?"

Olivia watched her mother struggle to lie to her, struggle to find something good to say, but it was no use. Her stepfather would not approve of this. And that was why they both had reason to fear.

"Excuse me?" The voice broke across Olivia's thoughts and she pulled them back from the dark day inside her mind. Her wide blue eyes, the only feature she and her mother shared, glanced over to the door and stared at the three young boys that crowded the entryway. Unable to speak with the lump that had formed in her throat, Olivia raised an eyebrow in question. " Can we sit here? The other compartments are full."

Olivia cleared her throat as she glanced out the window. To her surprise, the train had taken off while she had been lost in thought, the landscape she had gazed at briefly before whizzing past her now. They were officially on their way to Hogwarts. Olivia felt her heart sink into her stomach as she came to terms with the fact that there really was no going back now.

"Sure," Olivia said at last, scooting into the corner, wedging herself against the far wall as the boy took a seat next to her and his two friends sat on the side opposite. Subconsciously she pulled at her sleeves, wanting to make certain the bruises around her wrists weren't visible. She had been right in assuming her stepfather wouldn't be happy about Olivia's choice of schools.

"I'm Teddy Lupin," the boy said, leaning slightly forward, trying to gain her attention. With another little sigh, Olivia turned to the boy, looking at his face. He had brown hair cropped close to his head. His hair had the slightest hint of a curl to it, causing it to fall towards his brown eyes. Chocolate brown eyes that were smiling at her, as was the wide mouth that showed off white teeth with incisors that were just a little too long. The shape of his face reminded her just the littlest bit of a wolf, and she pinpointed the reason to be the way his eyeborws shadowed his face. All in all he was a very fortunate by to be so handsome. She supposed other young girls in her class would consider him cute, but Olivia was too preoccupied to actually take that into account.

"These are my two friends, Roger Prewen and Dylan Banks. What's your name?" He smiled wider at her. He seemed overly eager, excitement vibrating through his whole entire being. He must be a first year, she decided though she had guessed that frm the beginning. Teddy looked to be around her age.

"Olivia—"

"Teddy, leave her alone. She's just some stupid girl. I want to play Exploding snap!" One of the boys interrupted. She wasn't sure if it was Roger or Dylan, she hadn't honestly been paying attention during the introduction. But she was grateful of it. The last thing she wanted was to be drawn into a conversation.

"Don't be a git, Roger. I'm just making conversation. What did you say your name was?"

"Olivia Ballentine." escaped on a sigh.

"Teddy loves Olivia! Teddy loves Olivia!" shouted the other boy and soon the two were chorusing it in sign song voices, growing louder and louder until Olivia was sure that the surrounding compartments could hear also. She watched with mild irritation as Teddy's face grew red with embarrassment and equal parts anger.

"No I don't! Shut up!" Teddy launched himself across the compartment at the two boys and thus began the inevitable scuffle. Olivia felt her insides freeze up painfully at the sight of violence, a reaction she'd had most of her life but still couldn't control completely. She hastily turned her face away from the boys and stared out the window at the passing countryside. But she wasn't seeing it. Her mind was centered around another memory.

Her stepfather standing over her as she made herself as small as possible in the kitchen chair. Her mother sitting across from her, watching with fear filled eyes, clutching her hands so tightly together they shook. Even though they hadn't given him the letter, simply said she had been accepted to a school for "uniquely gifted children" he still hadn't been convinced. Or pleased to be pulled into the conversation. Olivia could see the anger swimming in his eyes, through is blood.

"You think I'll spend my hard earned money on you to go to some school for crazies?" The raging voice shouting in her ears as the face loomed ever closer. She could see the hatred in his eyes for the child that wasn't his but that he was forced to accept. The hatred for her.

Then later, the quick trip into Diagon Alley for the school supplies that had been hidden hastily in the attic. All those amazing sights to see, all those wonders of the witches and wizards that surrounded her, passed by her, would have left her in awe. The wand shop, where she had tried tens, maybe even hundreds, before the slim willow wood wand had produced a flurry of sparkling butterflyes. All of these she should have enjoyed, should have cherished. But she couldn't. Not a single minute of it. Because her mother had trembled beside her the entire time, constantly checking her watch, hurrying her along. And she had known what their fate would be if they had been caught.

Olivia had known from the start of the excursion that it had been against her stepfather's will that they be here. That the constant monitoring of time had been so they could be the first to arrive home. It was so that he would never know about it. They had returned home first, barely. But all that secrecy and anxiety had been for naught. He had noticed the missing funds later that week and there had been hell to pay.

And the final, most devastating memory of all. Sitting in the car, sweating bullets for each mile that they passed that brought her closer to King's Cross and closer to separation. The silence in the car had been deafening. And when they had arrived at their destination hours too early, Olivia hadn't wanted to get out of the car. Hadn't wanted to leave her mother alone.

For years Olivia had believed that she was the last thing standing between her mother and the true violence that lurked within her stepfather's soul. She had believed herself to be the shield that protected her mother from the death that she felt in her stepfather's hands whenever she was the focus of his rage. Olivia had seen him on more then one occasion temper his blows when it came to her, and she had wondered for years why it was so. But though she didn't understand, she had used it as often as possible. Stepping in between his fist and her mother.

Sitting in the back seat of their beat up old station wagon, she couldn't face the guilt that ate up her insides, or the certainty that the ten months she would spend apart from her mother's side would be the death of her. She had refused to move, refused to get out of the car. If she left, would she even have a place to return to at the end of the year? Instead, she had clutched the edge of the seat with all her might, and cried.

She could still hear her mothers voice now, and the sound of it within her head brought fresh tears stinging to her eyes. "You need to go Olivia. Please, this is what I want for you."

"No mommy, no!" Olivia had sobbed, clutching the seat all the harder, pushing her spine into the cushions, trying to become a part of the seat so she couldn't leave. "I won't leave you with him. I won't!"

"Baby, there's nothing to worry about. I'll be fine." But the tears had been in her eyes too. And Olivia knew that had been a lie too. So many lies.

"Please… don't make me," Olivia sobbed, feeling the despair welling up inside her like a wave that wanted to swallow her whole. She was drowning in it as she stared up into her mother's wide blue eyes and wondered if this would be the last time she ever saw her.

"Baby, listen to me. The greatest gift you can give me is to go to school and become educated. To follow the dream that I was never given. To make me proud. Please, for me."

Olivia had felt her resolve weaken, had felt her tense muscles slacken. And then her stepfather had lost patience with the entire scene. Shouting about imbecilic bastards he kicked open his door and stomped over to her side of the car. All the relaxation fled and Olivia felt herself become tenser then ever as she watched his progress.

Then he was at her door, leaning in and grabbing her by her upper arms, wrenching her from the seat. Her forehead bumped against the doorway as he forced her onto the sidewalk. She tried to pull herself away but her squeezed all the harder, causing her to yelp at the pinching pain, before pushing her away. She had stumbled and fallen, banging her knee on the concrete. Then his fists were around her arms again, pulling her up.

He dragged her to the back of the car and released one arm so he could open the back and drag out her trunk, throwing it half heartedly on the side walk. Giving her a shake and a push that made her stumble again and fall backwards onto to the hard ground.

And he was in the car, and it was starting and pulling into the street. Her mother's window was rolling down and then her mother's face, leaning out for just a moment, as she waved goodbye.

And that was the last sight of her mother that she had seen.

Would it be the last ever?

"What house do you want to be in?" The question interrupted the thoughts that dragged sluggishly through her brain. Her eyes focused on the passing landscape and she realized that quite some time had passed while she had been lost in thought. That and she was extremely cold. Her thin body was shuddering with huge shivers that wracked goose bumps down her arms and back.

"I want to be in Gryffindor," Roger offered up, or maybe it was Dylan?

"Me too!" Said Dylan (Roger?).

"As do I, my friends. As do I. But who wouldn't?" Teddy proclaimed as he sat up straight in his seat, his chest puffed out.

"What's Gryffindor?" The question slipped from Olivia's trembling lips before she could stop herself. She hadn't realized she was speaking, but now that the words were out, it was good for her to know. She hadn't really thought about school, or where she would sleep or what kinds of classes she would take, or anything really. All she had thought about was her mother and how it would possibly kill one or both of them to be separated for so long.

"You don't know?" This time she was almost certain it was Roger who spoke. He was the chubbiest of the three with muddy brown hair and piggish nose.

"Did you say your name was Ballentine? Are you related to Danton Ballentine?" That was from Dylan, who was taller then them all. He had blonde hair and pretty green eyes that stood out against his pale skin with the slightest dusting of freckles across his nose.

"Who's Danton Ballentine?" Roger again. Olivia was coming to the conclusion that he wasn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed.

"He invented all those cool spells. You know, about transfiguration. He also helped regulate how to become an Animagus. Haven't you heard of him? My grandmother tells me about him all the time. Seems he was some what of an idol to my mother before she died," Teddy said, before leaning forward again to catch Olivia's eye. "Are you related to him?"

As far as Olivia knew, her father had been a sailor on her stepfathers boat. Where he was now, and whether or not his name was Danton Ballentine, Olivia had no clue. Her mother had never deemed to share that information. Olivia felt her shoulders shrug before she answered quietly into the expecting silence, "No."

"Oh. Are you from a Muggle family then? It would make sense, seeings how you don't know about Gryffindor and the like." Catching the raised eyebrows on Olivia's face, Teddy explained further. "A Muggle family is a non-magical family. Can anyone in your family do magic Olivia?"

She pursed her lips as she thought of this. It wasn't quite as simple to answer as she would have anticipated. Her mother, certainly, had never displayed any sign of magic. And neither had her stepfather. Her mother hadn't been surprised at all by the letter from Hogwarts, however. In fact, she seemed to have been dreading it. So she must have known about the magical world. That could mean that someone in her extended family might have been a witch or a wizard. But since she hadn't met anyone in her extended family, ever, she wouldn't know if that was the case.

"I guess I am from a Muggle family," Olivia allowed, after thinking it over. Technically, she was from one. Whether magic ran in her family, since she didn't know her entire parentage or family, was inconclusive.

"Then you don't know anything about Hogwarts?" Roger asked, slightly shocked. Olivia shook her head slightly, causing her bangs to ruffle and fall into her eyes.

"Anything at all?" Dylan repeated. Olivia shook her head again, her bangs becoming even more disheveled. Unconsciously Olivia reached up to brush them aside. Her sleeves, already slightly too short for her long arms, pulled back and the bruises around her wrist stood out in the light of the cabin for the briefest glimpse.

"What are—" Teddy began, but stopped as he watched Olivia pull the sleeves hastily back down and cover them up. He seemed to be the only of the three that noticed and watched as her turned a deep red of shame.

"What's Gryffindor?" Olivia asked a littl too loudly, talking over him. She wanted to change the subject before anything else more painful was brought up, but it seemed she had no need. Teddy didn't mention it again. He launched into a lengthy explanation of the four houses and then gave another, even longer explanation of the sorting hat, which Olivia found to be immensely intriguing.

"Is it true that the sorting hat can read our mind?" Roger breathed, leaning so far forward he was in danger of falling off his seat. Teddy seemed very knowledgeable about Hogwarts and all that it entailed. She wondered where he had learned so much.

"My Uncle Ron told me that he can read every thought you've ever had. And that no matter what, you can't hide them from him. Because he's got magic from all four of the head of houses. That's why he's the sorting hat."

"But what if you have thoughts that Slytherin's have?" Roger demanded.

"Yeah! What if he wants to put me in Slytherin?" quipped Dylan, also leaning forward on his chair.

"Well, my godfather told me that when he was being sorted, he had Slytherin thoughts in him too, but he had more Gryffindor then Slytherin. And he thought really hard about wanting to be in Gryffindor, and so that hat must have heard and gave him what he wanted. You can do that too!" Teddy explained calmly. Olivia didn't see what the problem with Slytherin was. Sure, it wouldn't be her first choice of house. But there didn't appear to be anything _wrong_ with it. Not like Hufflepuff.

"That's what I'll do then," Roger declared loudly, straightening his shoulders and lifting up his chin. "And you have to do it too. Because we all have to be in Gryffindor together!"

Teddy looked sideways towards Olivia and asked quietly, "Are you going to ask the sorting hat to be in Gryffindor also? Are you gonna be in same house as us?"

She considered it for a moment. Gryffindor would be a nice house, she knew. But it honestly didn't matter to her. As she saw it now, the only thing that mattered was focusing on her education, as her mother had asked of her. Her heart pinched painfully and she felt the fresh sting of tears.

With a shrug she replied. "Possibly. But wouldn't it be best to let the sorting hat decide for me? That's what he's for, after all."

Teddy was about to reply when an older student knocked quietly on the door and announced that they would be arriving at Hogwarts within the half hour and that it would be best if they changed into their school appointed robes.

Dutifully Olivia dug out her school robes and pulled them on over her conservative outfit before taking her seat once more. Her mind wandered away from the conversation that had moved onto ghosts and moving staircases and thought back to what she had decided.

Yes, it didn't matter which house she had been placed into. Her resolve had strengthened and she realized that it wouldn't do to mope about her mother. This is what she had wanted right? Wasn't those some of the very last words she had spoken to Olivia? Her mother wanted her to study, wanted her to succeed. So that's what she would do. She would focus all her attention on excelling in her classes. Once she figured out what they would be.

The rest of the journey passed in a blur. Before she knew it she was following a rather gigantic and hairy man towards an even more gigantic lake filled with tiny little boats. She climbed into one and was soon joined by Teddy, Roger, and Dylan, who seemed too awed by the sight of the castle to continue any more conversation.

Then she was standing in the great hall being lectured by a rather stern looking man who had proclaimed himself Professor Kinsley teacher of transfiguration and head of the Gryffindor house. He pushed them all into a semi-straight line and led them through a magnificent set of double doors.

Olivia stepped into it the Great Hall, slightly in front of Dylan, looked up and caught her first sight of true magic. As she stood beneath the enchanted ceiling that twinkled with thousands of tiny little stars where they weren't obscured by the lazily floating clouds, Olivia resolved to never forget the sight before her or the way reality finally set in.

Buying her cauldron and potions ingredients, all those spell books that she had yet to open, the weird and slightly uncomfortable robes, even her wand, hadn't made her realize what she was becoming. Not until this moment, hundreds of miles away from the one person she had ever loved and about to face the most grueling tests of her life, had she fully accepted where her life was going.

And then Professor Kinsley was calling out names and the children were going forward and being placed into the houses. She looked around the Great Hall more firmly and saw the four separate tables, the house indicated by the banners hanging from the walls at the end. It was easy to discern which house was which. The teachers table was the one that interested her the most, but before she had time to really study the men and women seated at it, she heard her name being called.

With a start she stepped forward and scrambled onto the stool in front of her. She looked up at Kinsley just as he was dropping the hat onto her head. It fell below her eyes and a loud, obnoxious voice filled her mind.

_Obnoxious am I?_

I would say so, Olivia thought back with mild irritation. It wasn't exactly pleasant to have her mind invaded like this.

_Hmm… Ballentine. Any relation to Danton? He was interesting, just like you. Had that same little spark._

You can read my mind, hat. You obviously know I'm not aware of whom my father is or if he is this Danton you speak of, Olivia thought crossly. Honestly, she had assumed since the sorting hat claimed to be made up of nothing but magic, and had been in commission for so many hundreds of years, that it would be just a little bit smarter.

_Snotty little brat, are you not? Perhaps Slytherin is where you belong._

If it gets your unintelligent thoughts out of my mind, by all means.

_Really, there's no need to be insulting. Besides being a little bit on the quippy side, I don't think Slytherin is for you. Hmm… quite a puzzle you are. As was Danton. Are you sure you're of no relation?_

Olivia was certain this was said just to irritate her further. She refused to answer since she was well aware of his ploy.

_No? All right then. You shall be in…_

"RAVENCLAW!"

Then the hat was gone and Kinsley was pushing her ever so gently towards the table that was cheering so loudly for her. She sat shakily in an empty seat, hating the way all the eyes of the table were trained on her, even for those few brief moments.

Then Dylan Banks was being called and he was placed in Gryffindor, as were Teddy and a little later, Roger. The feast began and the people around her dug into the plates of food overflowing in the middle of the table. Three young girls who had also been accepted into Ravenclaw joined her on either side. They kept up steady conversation, but left her alone after she refused to be drawn in.

Before she knew it the feast was over and she was following the crowd through the halls, up several flights of stairs, past the most peculiar paintings in which the contents moved around as they pleased, to a door that asked the lead of the group a very intriguing question. The answer quite surprised Olivia, as it was not what she would have expected.

She followed the other three girls through the doorway into a cozy common room, lit with several fires and filled with table, couches and chairs. Yawning heavily she continued to follow the girls across the common room, up some stairs and into a dormitory. One of the beds had her trunk at the foot. She walked to it and had just enough energy to pull on her nightclothes and fall into the bed.

As her eyes drifted shut, her last thought was that she would do her best to make her mother proud.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two: First Year

The first few months of school went by rather quickly for Olivia. Though it took her a while to become used to the method of schooling, such as quills and ink instead of regular pens, parchment instead of paper, and of course, the most shocking of all, a wand, she sank quiet easily into a routine.

By the end of her first day of lessons, Olivia came to the conclusion that she absolutely adored Hogwarts. Using magic was like nothing she had ever experienced in life. The way the incantation rolled from her lips, the way the wand vibrated in her hand as the spell soared from the tip, finding the perfect combination of the two actions, it was fascinating to her.

A passion began to burn within her, a need to learn as much as she possibly could, a compulsion to study how varying the slightest of movements or pronunciations could alter the spell. She found that all her energy was focused on studying the magic that she felt coursing through her veins every moment of everyday.

It wasn't long before the material she studied in classes wasn't enough to satisfy her cravings. She began to study further ahead, reading later and later chapters in her textbooks until she had read them all. Then she re-read them, doing her best to memorize the spells.

When she finished studying all the course work that would be assigned to her that year, which took her all of a month and a half, she discovered the wonders of the library. The rows upon rows of books enthralled her and she soon allowed them to become her second home. It became a common sight to see her with her nose buried in a book when she wasn't avidly taking notes in class.

Her fellow year mates, the three girls that shared her dorm and the five boys that were also within her house, soon gave up in trying to befriend her. It wasn't that she was unresponsive when they approached her. She was perfectly willing to set down her book when addressed. It was just that she didn't encourage their efforts at friendships.

If asked a question she was very likely to respond with the correct answer, after contemplating it for several moments. She had noticed that most of the first years found this to be odd. Her logical and exacting answers seemed to defeat the purpose of casual conversation and they soon stopped noticing her at all. She had several classes with the Gryffindors, as well as the other houses, but like her fellow Ravenclaw year mates, she didn't speak to any of them, nor did she really pay them any attention. All her thoughts centered on her education, almost like a compulsion to keep out all other, more painful, thoughts.

It wasn't until a letter arrived from her mother that she realized she had been using learning magic as a buffer against the pain of separation and the often panic-filled moments when she wondered if her mother was still alive.

The first letter arrived in late October. Olivia was seated at the far end of the Ravenclaw table, head buried in a book, a piece of bacon forgotten in her right hand. She was deeply engrossed in a defensive arts novel, her second favorite subject. She was certain that she would eventually come across a spell that would keep her mother safe. Every page she turned, she believed, brought her one page closer to the answer.

The whoosh of the owls sweeping into the hall had ceased to startle her after the first week, and today she didn't even notice it. The brown owl that landed behind her book ruffled its feathers in an attempt to gain her attention, but decided to peck at Olivia's fingers when the ruffling failed.

With a wince, Olivia snatched the book to her chest and glared down at the indignant owl. It wasn't until she tried to ask what it wanted that she realized how long it had been since she talked. Her voice was scratchy with disuse.

"What is it bird? Who are you looking for?" She asked quietly before chewing on the bacon that had been in her hand. As the owl held out its leg for her, Olivia felt the bacon harden painfully in her stomach.

"Me?" She squeaked. The owl hooted in response and hopped a little bit closer. Suddenly, the Defense spells meant nothing to her, the wand in her hand just another piece of wood. In a flash she was no longer Olivia Ballentine, aspiring witch, but just plain old Olivia, and all her fears were that much more real.

Her hands trembled so violently as she tried to remove the letter that she nearly knocked the bird over. It was quite glad to be free of her and left without so much as another hoot. With the letter gripped in both hands, Olivia didn't see it leave.

The letter was addressed to her, with a stamp and a return address that she recognized as her mother's house. She could see that her mother had attempted to send it by conventional mail, but it had somehow found it's way to an owlery. She would have to find out how that worked.

But first things first. As Olivia stared at the letter, her insides began to shake, the trembles spreading out until it was her entire body that was quivering. What was in the letter? Was it good or bad? She had to still be alive to be able to send her a letter, so that meant it was possibly good news. Then again, it could just as easily be a letter saying that her stepfather was on his last straw and she couldn't have that much more time left.

Olivia rapidly came to the conclusion that she couldn't open this letter in the Great Hall, not with all those prying eyes on her. Though she knew no one noticed her, or would likely notice her if she did receive the worst news possible, she couldn't stomach the thought that someone might.

Forgetting her book, bag, and half eaten plate of food, Olivia stood from the table and walked quickly and quietly from the hall. She stopped just outside the doors and collapsed immediately on the main stairs, breathing heavily.

Her fingers made it difficult to open the letter with all the shaking they were doing, but she finally managed to pull out the faded to yellow paper. It was folded neatly in threes and a quick glance at the handwriting showed that it had been written with a steady hand. Not the characteristics of a last letter kind of thing. Maybe it was good news after all?

With a deep breath, Olivia launched herself into the letter.

_My dearest Livy,_

_I hope this letter finds you in good health. I regret not having said a proper goodbye at the station, as well as the fact that it took so long for me to write you this letter. I know how you will have worried needlessly. Always my fierce little protector. I am fine._

_Your stepfather has gone out to sea; he will be gone until just before you are due to return from your classes for the summer. However, I believe it would be best that you remained at school for Christmas. I know that you will want to protest this, but I feel it is for the best. If you were to come home for that short break, I don't believe I'll have the strength to send you away from me again._

_I must confess, my dearest Livy, that I miss you terribly. It was harder then I could ever have imagined letting you go. But this really is for the best. One day I will explain to you why it is so imperative that you pursue your magical education with all of your heart and mind. But today is not the day. Just know that every moment you spend learning is a moment in which I feel pride for you._

_Know that I always love you, and I am counting the days until you return. I will try to send you more letters, but until then, carry with you my heart, for it is yours, my daughter._

_Love,_

_Your Mother_

Clutching the letter in her hand, Olivia bent at the waist, pressing her forehead against her knees. The news about Christmas had been a blow to her heart that she hadn't been expecting. Until the letter, she hadn't thought of what she would do for the holidays. But within the minute that she read the word she had dared to dream of seeing her mother again only to have the full meaning of the sentence crush that dream viscously.

Tears filled her eyes and spilled over as she felt an overwhelming sense of homesickness swamp her. Her stepfather was out to sea, so her mother was ok. For now. But the months that he spent away were the best for Olivia. It was when he was absent from their home that her mother lost that haunted look in her eye, lost the frailness. It was then that Olivia felt most like a child with a loving mother.

To miss out on almost ten months of those blissful moments when she could laugh without fear of waking the monster, of banging the dishes in the kitchen, of screaming out her frustration, was depressing. Olivia felt her thin little shoulders start to shake with silent sobs as the tears dripped onto her school robes.

"Olivia?" called a voice.

With a gasp, Olivia sat up straight and muttered a spell towards her face to clear away the tears. However, she was certain that her eyes as well as the tip of her nose were quite red. Embarrassment began to curl in her stomach.

She sniffed pitifully and looked at the person standing before her. Teddy Lupin. She tilted her head to the side softly and brought her brows down in consternation. What was he doing here? She hadn't spoken to him since the train. In fact, she had nearly forgotten he even existed until this very moment.

"What is it?" She asked in a voice thick with tears as she clutched her hands tight around her wand and the now tear-stained letter. She watched as his ears turned the slightest red in embarrassment and gestured weakly with his hands.

"You forgot these at your table when you left. I thought…" he seemed to flounder for words as she looked even more puzzled. He was holding her book bag and the defensive spell book she had been reading from.

"Oh."

The sudden act of kindness made the pain of not seeing her mother all the more harder. She couldn't find a logical explanation as to why his actions had made her miss her mother, but nonetheless fresh tears filled her eyes and to both their horrors, began to fall down her cheeks.

"Don't—" Teddy spluttered hastily, the male's gut reaction to female tears.

"Thanks!" Olivia cut him off as she grabbed her things from his hands and ran up the stairs without another word. She booked it for the library, where she was most comfortable, wanting to hide away until she could control her emotions again.

In her actions, she didn't notice when the letter slipped from her hands and fluttered to the floor. Teddy bent down and grabbed it up quickly. He glanced at the tearstains before shoving it into his pocket and out of sight.

In class later that day Olivia worked extra hard on her notes. If she saw Teddy trying to catch her eye during the Transfiguration class they shared, she only ducked her head lower and concentrated harder. Hard enough that the embarrassment was drowned in a field of knowledge.

* * *

Olivia, after reliving the embarrassing scene several times, immersed herself so far into her studies that time seemed to pass without any meaning to her. She vaguely recalled the sign up sheet being pushed into her hands, asking her if she intended to stay over the Christmas holiday, and she signed it with a shaking quill.

But then she was in the library, sitting at her favorite table, immersed in a book, or pouring over parchment as she completed assignments. She did notice a sudden increase in the amount of homework she received, but while other students groaned, she smiled. It just meant she had more things to learn, more magic to master.

And then one day she was sitting in class, putting away the last of her freshly made notes and pulling out her day planner, ready to write down her assignments, already trying to organize how she would spend her time completing her other tasks. What she would work on first, how much time she would allow herself to complete it, if she would do any extra research other then what had been explained to her in class and what she already knew.

Professor Flitwick, however, instead of assigning more homework wished them a Merry Christmas and said he would see them at the start of the new term in three weeks time. This caused Olivia to blink in confusion, and then stare down at her day planner. Sure enough, the date was deceivingly close to Christmas.

A depression wanted to creep into her, a depression that came directly from the thought of not seeing her mother again until June, and she struggled to push it back by thinking of the spell to lift things into the air. She had read somewhere in a text book for third years that you could go further after lifting by casting another charm for hovering, but she was almost certain that with the right wand movement, she could effectively lift and hover with the same charm…

And just like that she re-entered her fog. She stopped observing the passing of time once more as she contemplated just what the right wand movement could be. Or perhaps it had to do more with how she pronounced the incantation?

Christmas morning came as quite a shock to Olivia. She had been using her holidays to study up on the coursework that had been covered so far, going over the useful spells she had been taught and adding on her own spin and alterations to make them easier for herself to perform.

Consequently, she had been quite late the night before, finally achieving the lift and hover charm in one. It had been a combination of the incantation, Wingardium Leviosa, and wand movement. She found if she drew out the S sound in Leviosa, and added a final jab high in the air at the end of her wand flick, she could get the object to however quite nicely. She wondered why the teachers had never mentioned this in class.

Due to her late studies, she had slept in until nearly half way through the morning and didn't wake until after ten. She stretched with a yawn and a slight grumble in her stomach, for dinner had been quite some time before. Rubbing her sleepy eyes, she stretched her feet out as far as she could, feeling the muscles pull, and feeling something quite heavy nudge against he foot.

With a quizzical frown, she looked towards the end of her bed and saw a small pile of neatly wrapped presents. She hesitated before opening them, feeling the depression tugging at her heart. But if they were from her mother, wouldn't it be good if she opened them? Maybe there was something within the pile that would make her happy again…

Several minutes, and even more presents opened, later Olivia sat surrounded by shiny new objects that did very little to lift her spirits. Her mother had sent her a new scarf, blue to match her eyes, a very pretty locket that had a picture of her mother on one side and a blank frame on the other. She had put this on immediately and ran her fingers along the silver chain now. She had also received two new books, one of which was about magical history, one of her more favored subjects, and another that contained some of the most intriguing transfiguration spells that was written by none other than Danton Ballentine. The rest of her presents had been extra school supplies, such as quills, ink, and parchments, which she was very grateful for.

She had received one other present, wrapped almost haphazardly with more tape then was ever needed. It was small and came with no note, but she knew it wasn't from her mother due to it's terrible wrapping job, and that paper it came in, which was different from all the rest.

Inside, folded neatly into tissue paper was a delicate silver bracelet. The clasp was of two interlinking hearts and dangling from the middle were two small charms. They were of beautifully written cursive. An O and a B.

Olivia Ballentine.

She puzzled over who would have bought this for her, and why. It obviously wasn't from her mother, as her mother had already gotten her jewelry, the necklace. But she didn't have any other relatives that could have sent it to her. At least, none that she knew of or who had tried to contact her before today. It seemed highly unlikely that they would start now with a bracelet that was obviously of high quality.

Perhaps it was from a professor? Or maybe even the headmaster, one Professor McGonagall? But no, that made no sense either. She didn't talk to her professors nor the headmaster, not even once. She was certain they didn't even know her name. Sure, they read all her homework assignments, and graded them, but this was done almost anonymously. The homework was turned in with a stack of others and was passed back in that same stack. No, she was unknown to her teachers.

As well as her fellow students. She wasn't friends with any of them. After the first few weeks of school, when she had proven herself to be a bit of a recluse and nearly entirely obsessed with her studies, they had stopped trying to talk to her, stopped noticing her.

So who could it be from?

Scrunching up her nose to keep her glasses from falling down, she shrugged. What did it matter? It was obviously for her, since it had been delivered to her room and had her initials on it. And it was pretty. Almost more beautiful then the necklace given to her by her mother. Like all mysteries, she was certain that there was a logical explanation behind who had given her the bracelet. She simply hadn't thought of it yet.

Clasping it onto her wrist, Olivia grabbed her newest book, the one by Danton Ballentine and headed out of the girls dormitory and down the stairs. Her initial destination was the library, as she wanted some place quiet to read. She had assumed that the rest of her roommates were awake already and down in the common room and she intended only to pass through.

But as she walked into the common room she found it, strangely, deserted. Not a soul was in sight. She frowned as she walked cautiously over to the comfy looking couches sat before the fire that was roaring within the mantel. Though the backs of the chairs faced her, she was certain that if she peered around the edge to look, there would be no one sitting in them.

Sure enough, they were empty. With slow movements, afraid that at any moment someone would pop through the door and startle her, Olivia sank down into the armchair before the fire. They were as comfortable as they had always looked to her.

Sighing, Olivia sank down into the cushions more firmly and opened up her book. She had never actually sat in one of the chairs before. Mostly because whenever she was in the common room, which was very rarely, students always occupied them, students she wasn't interested in approaching.

Now, there were no students. So she felt free to sit in the chairs for as long as she liked. With a puzzled frown, Olivia decided that she was probably the only student who had decided, or been forced rather, to stay at school over the Christmas holiday. She was likely the only student who came from a troubled home, who had a mother that "loved her too much to let go of a second time".

With a sigh, Olivia concentrated hard on the words before her instead of the black thoughts in her head. She read for quite some time, oblivious to the empty common room around her and the fire that crackled as it spread its warmth over her body as she curled into the chair.

So when a loud POP sounded, ricocheting off the walls and bouncing along all the nerve endings in her entire being, Olivia let out a shrill scream, jumped up from the chair, and dropped her book as she clutched at her chest, breathing heavily as her wide eyes came to rest on the funny little creature standing before her.

"Excuse me miss, Tully did not mean to scare you," the tiny creature said, looking up at her with huge eyes, eyes that took up nearly two thirds of her face. If it was a her, that is. Olivia had the hardest time telling, as the creature didn't exactly have hair or features that could distinguish it as male or female. And though it wasn't naked, it wasn't wearing what she would consider clothes.

"Tha—" Olivia paused to clear her throat as she found it was scratchy with disuse. "That's quite alright… I was reading you see… I wasn't paying much attention."

Olivia watched in horror as the huge eyes welled with tears, big liquid tears that dripped slowly from her eyes onto the carpet with loud plops.

"Really its quite alright! There's no need to cry, you've done nothing wrong, I assure you," she stepped forward hastily as she spoke wanting to bring comfort to the creature before her. She was certain now that the creature was female. She didn't believe that a male would cry that way. The elf, for she recognized the creature now as a house elf, what with the big pointed ears and lack of proper clothing that she had read of in a book somewhere, sniffed and wiped at one last tear.

"Well, if Misses says it's alright…"

"Yes, yes, I'm quite fine. You did no harm at all. No need for tears now," Olivia tried her hand at a smile and found it almost as hard as talking. It seemed she had gone quite some time without doing that as well.

"Yes, Miss. Tully has been sent to request that you join the teachers and other students who remained for a Christmas dinner. It is set to start in a half hours time," Tully said with a deep bow.

"Yes, well, thank you I am rather hungry. I guess I shall head down now," Olivia said awkwardly. She wasn't sure what else she was supposed to say to the elf. It seemed like forever since she had had a conversation with someone, let alone an elf.

"Pardon me, Miss. But wouldn't you like to err… change?" Tully's eyes started to tear up as if she had said something bad. Olivia frowned at the elf, but hastily stopped when she heard the plopping of more tears. However, looking down she realized she was still in her night things.

"Oh, yes, I suppose you're right," Olivia nodded before bending to gather up her book.

"And maybe, brush your hair?" the elf suggested timidly, but luckily without any more tears.

"My curls are a bit unruly. Are you going to suggest a bath as well?" Olivia teased lightly as she smiled crookedly at the elf, finding it a little bit easier this time.

"I would yes, but Misses doesn't have enough time for that," Tully said quite seriously. Olivia frowned again. She hadn't realized her appearance was that bad. But then again, she had been living in a fog.

"Well, I'll just go freshen up then," Olivia said with a small sigh as she headed up to her dormitory. She went into the bathroom and stared at her face in the mirror above the sink. She supposed she had let her appearance slack off. It wasn't that she had given up on personal hygiene, far from it. She brushed her teeth twice a day as well as showered, mostly every day unless she forgot or was too busy. But she had let her hair run a little wild.

With a sigh, she took off her thin-rimmed glasses and washed her face quickly in the warm water. Then she brushed her teeth thoroughly before sliding her glasses back on and grabbing her hairbrush.

There were several tangles in her curls, which made her wince every time she pulled her brush through one, but at last her black hair, which reached a little past her shoulders, was shining and flowing with lose curls.

Now, what to wear? She walked back into her dorm room and fell to her knees before her trunk. She wasn't even sure what she had packed in there anymore, or what was clean, if there were any clean clothes left in there! It was like she hadn't been paying attention to anything other then her studies, she thought with a frown as she rummaged through her things. When had she become like this?

At last, after digging down to the very bottom of her trunk, she decided on a cream colored fitted sweater that had quarter length sleeves, coupled with a black pleated skirt that stopped a little short of her knees. She must have been hitting a growth spurt because the last time she had warn this skirt, it had reached below her knees.

As she was turning to leave for the great hall, Olivia spied her transfiguration book. She agonized for several moments over whether or not she should take it with her down to the feast. After all, it might be that there was no one at the feast at all besides teachers and she would be completely bored out of her mind. Why waste such a good opportunity to study?

But Tully had mentioned "fellow students" when she had asked Olivia to come down to the great hall. That meant that there would be students there. And while she felt no problem hiding within a large group of students by burying her head in a book, it would be quite noticeable if she were one of just a few students.

No, best to leave it behind even though she wanted to clutch it in her hands like a lifeline. Bracing herself for the unknown, Olivia left her common room and started towards the Great Hall with shaking limbs.

AN: Review please :]


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three:

Walking into the Great Hall caused Olivia to pause for a moment. It had been decorated in the most beautiful fashion. Incredibly tall trees lined the room, hiding away the four house tables that had been pushed against the walls, as there was no need for them. The trees themselves looked to be the regular fir tree that she would find at home, yet several times taller. Olivia smiled as she imagined trying to fit a tree that big into her living room.

All of the trees twinkled with little faerie lights that grew brighter when you stared at them, which she did, causing the twinkles to reflect in her eyes. Some of the trees were dusted lightly with fresh snow, and the faerie lights in those trees seemed to shiver with cold.

Four of the trees had been decorated with the house colors, and Olivia couldn't help but think that the Gryffindor house really did get the best set of colors. Red and gold were her favorite for decorating the Christmas tree at home. As for her own house tree, it was beautiful, but not her favorite. Maybe she had been placed in the wrong house? Olivia shook her head slightly. No, she was much too clever to be in any other house but Ravenclaw.

Thinking about all these trees brought her thoughts to her mother, and she wondered if her mother had gotten a tree for Christmas. Had she decorated it with red and gold like the Gryffindor tree? Had she strung up pretty gold lights that shone from within the branches? Had she missed her daughter while she put on all the decorations, leaving the topper for the last? Had she cried when she put on that topper, remembering how years before she had lifted her baby girl up to do it, and then later, held her steady while she stood on the ladder to do so?

Or was she spending it alone and sad, sitting by an unlit fire, holding a cold mug of tea, shivering under a threadbare blanket? Was she staring off into the distance wishing she could have her only daughter by her side?

Tearing herself from those thoughts, Olivia glanced quickly up at the enchanted ceiling. The sight of the beautiful sky above never failed to lift her mood, not since that first time she had looked up and realized the potential for greatness she had walked into. The same was true for tonight. With a smile she gazed up at the sky. The sun was shining out from behind snow clouds, great big gray clouds that fluffed across the ceiling. She could almost feel the wind across her skin as the clouds moved with the gentle current.

"Excuse me, Miss? But would you care to take a seat?" A voice called, breaking into Olivia's observation of the passing clouds. With a start, Olivia snapped her head back down straight and looked towards the source of the voice. It was coming from the one table that had been set in the middle of the room. From the looks of it, it was filled with teachers.

Olivia nodded shyly before walking over to the table and taking the first empty spot she came to, which happened to be in the middle of the table as it faced her length wise. Quickly she pulled out the chair, sat, and scooted herself back in before looking down the length of the table to see whom else was there.

So far, it was just the teachers who had elected to stay behind for the holidays, chatting quietly to one another. Olivia recognized some of them, though not many. She may have had classes with the majority left behind, but her focus was more often then not on her notes. It was a rare thing if she paid attention to more than just the words that were coming out of their mouths.

However, she did recognize her head of house, Professor Flitwick, as well as the Headmaster, Professor McGonagall. She smiled vaguely at them before turning her eyes back up to the ceiling, wondering when the other students would arrive. Unless… Unless Tully had been mistaken and she really was the only student who had to stay here over Christmas break and it was going to be terribly boring and she really should have brought her book with her—

"May I sit here?" a voice asked politely as a hand touched briefly and gently against her shoulder. Olivia whipped her head around and up to look at the person who had spoken to her, her eyes wide with slight shock. No one spoke to her, really, no one except…

"Teddy Lupin?" She asked in a breathy voice. What was he doing here? He hardly seemed like the type who came from a troubled home. He was nice, kind, seemed intelligent enough from the two times that she had actually spoken to him. So why wasn't he at home sitting at an over-crowded table surrounded by a loving family?

"Olivia Ballentine?" He asked back with a smile. Olivia glanced past his shoulder to see his friend Dylan with him, but no Roger. Good, she didn't much care for Roger. Perhaps that was why Teddy had stayed over for the holidays, too keep Dylan company.

"Well?" He asked a little quieter, his smile faltering just the slightest.

"Oh!" Olivia gasped remembering his first question. "Yes of course, sit!" she patted the seat beside her quickly then blushed red in the face at her action. Really, there was no need to act like a mother hen. He obviously knew what she meant without the patting motion because he sat down, didn't he?

Absorbed in her sudden embarrassment, Olivia clasped her hands tightly on the table and stared down at them, pretending she found her fingers to be the most interesting thing in the world. She concentrated on the lines around her knuckles until she felt her face cool down enough that they were almost normal once more.

"That's a pretty bracelet," Teddy said as he scooted his chair into the table. Olivia glanced up and saw Dylan take the seat next to him. A girl who looked a little older then herself and sporting more Gryffindor colors sat beside Dylan and three older boys as well as an older girl wearing Slytherin colors sat across from them, looking too important to join in conversation with any other then themselves.

"Yes it is," Olivia agreed quietly as she jingled it along her wrist. "It has the most beautiful cursive letters for charms. See?"

With a smile she lifted up the bracelet for Teddy to look at. She glanced at his face and saw him staring intently at her own, almost as if waiting for their eyes to meet. She saw his bright smile out of the corner of her eyes as she watched his crinkle up with a mix of mirth and happiness. Then he was reaching for her wrist and pulling it so he could hold it so the light twinkled on the silver chain.

"Ah… yes, they are quite fancy. Simple, yet elegant," He peered a little closer before setting her hand back down on the table. "It suits you. Who was it from?"

"I don't know," Olivia murmured, looking down at the bracelet. A logical explanation for who had sent her the bracelet had yet to come to her. But thinking about it after hearing Teddy's words, it did suit her. It was something that she would pick out for herself. So the person who had bought it for her, must have been someone who knew her well.

There was only one person who fit that bill: her mother. But she had already been ruled out, hadn't she? Best to know for sure, as she was currently the only logical explanation. She would send an owl to her mother tomorrow asking her about the bracelet.

"You don't know who gave it to you? Does that mean you have a secret admirer?" Teddy asked with a huge smile and a playful nudge to her elbow, which caused her to blush again. The thought of a secret admirer was infinitely embarrassing, but luckily Professor McGonagall standing to give a quick speech saved her from having to answer that question.

Then the plates were filling with the most delicious food overwhelming the senses. The smell of mashed potatoes wove its way into her nose and she closed her eyes as she inhaled the scent. She loved mashed potatoes. With a wide smile she filled her plate with that and nothing else.

"Like those, do you?" Teddy asked as he grabbed some turkey as well as a small portion of mashed potatoes. He had a biscuit and also some sort of potpie. Olivia couldn't quite tell what it was.

Unwillingly, words were spilling out of her mouth. "My mother makes the best mashed potatoes in the world. On the one Christmas where my stepfather was out to sea and we could really celebrate, my mother made a huge batch of mashed potatoes, so many we thought we would never be able to eat it all. We sat in the living room, before the fire, something we're never allowed to do. Just me and her. She read me a story about a happy family and I could swear it was almost real. It's the happiest I've ever been."

She glanced quickly up at Teddy to see his reaction, but he just continued to quietly eat his food, as if what she said about "happy families" and her stepfather was perfectly natural. She wasn't fooled however; she knew that her family was not the typical one. Perhaps, he didn't come from a happy family also. Perhaps what she went through was similar to his own situation. Perhaps he understood.

"My cousin Victoire loves mashed potatoes too. Every Christmas, she always eats them all before I get some. Sneaky brat," but he said it with a smile on his face. No, he didn't come from the same place she did. He was one of the lucky ones.

"Tell me about your family," Olivia said, surprising herself again. She normally didn't want to have her unhappy situation thrown at her. But today was a different day, she could feel it. Today, she wanted to know what it was like to be loved by more then just one woman who lived the majority of her life in fear.

She listened avidly as Teddy told her of all his cousins, of his uncles and aunts who spoiled him rotten, of his godfather Harry Potter, who Olivia recognized immediately from books she had read. She was impressed by this, but didn't mention anything. Teddy talked of his grandmother with such love that Olivia wondered if she was his primary family member. Maybe he was a little like her, maybe he didn't have a mother and father and so knew some of what it was like.

He spoke most of his young cousin Victoire. She was two years his senior and quite a handful, as far as she could tell. From what Olivia had been told, the girl sounded a bit like a brat, and very selfish, but Teddy seemed to favor her. Olivia called him on that.

"Victoire is your favorite, is she not?" She asked as she pushed away her empty plate. Teddy was still digging into his, on his third serving of ham (after his one serving of turkey), eating steadily between words. This however, seemed to give him pause.

"What?" he seemed slightly taken aback. "No, I don't have a favorite. I love them all equally. Why do you ask?"

"Just the way you speak of her. You mention her more then the others. And the way you mention her. It is with a certain fondness that you do not present with others. Perhaps I am mistaken, but it sounds to me as if you like her more then the others. Perhaps because you have more in common?"

Teddy was frowning and shaking his head, but Olivia was soon distracted as the food disappeared from the table before her and was replaced by desert. Sitting in a dish before her was a gigantic platter of cheesecake.

"My favorite!" Olivia squealed as she grabbed the pie slice and put the biggest one she could find onto her plate. She hadn't had cheesecake in forever. Cheesecake was a delicacy at her house, too expensive to buy just any old time. Her stepfather knew that Olivia liked it, so he therefore refused to have it in the house. But that was one story she would not be sharing with Teddy.

"Excuse me, dear, but would you mind passing me a slice of that cheesecake?" Olivia looked at the voice. It was Professor Flitwick. He was smiling at her from across the table and two seats to the left from her. His plate was being held out towards her. Standing she reached and slide a slice onto his plate then smiled at him.

Suddenly she was reminded of her earlier thoughts. About the hover charm. She frowned in puzzlement, wondering if she should ask him. It wasn't an appropriate place really, not with all these other students surrounding her. What if he didn't appreciate being called out in front of his fellow teachers?

But then again, she had been living the past three months in a fog, almost a complete daze when it concerned the world outside her studies. What if she fell back into that fog after tonight? What if she never had the chance to ask him again?

"Professor Flitwick? Would it be all right if I asked you a question. Concerning our coursework," the words were tumbling out of her mouth almost before she had decided that she was indeed going to ask, despite the people who were sitting around her, likely staring at her.

"Ah, a very persistent student. Remind you of someone, Minerva?" Flitwick called with a quick glance towards the headmaster. Olivia feared for almost a moment that she had made a grave mistake and that he was angry with her for interrupting his holiday with pesky questions. After all, he was on vacation as much as the rest of them.

However, he turned back to her with a patient smile. "Are you having trouble learning something? Because I am certain if you are, I can set up a time and a tutor for you."

Olivia sighed with relief before quickly glancing at Teddy to see if he as paying attention, praying he wasn't. However, he was watching her just as avidly as ever. That made it hard for her to continue, as she found his eyes on her most unnerving, but it would be even harder to retreat now.

"No, Professor, it's not that. I was wondering about a modification to the levitating charm we had learned. I was wondering why you didn't mention it in class," Olivia tried to make sure her voice was loud enough for Flitwick to hear, and not too fast, as she was feeling nervous now and knew she had a habit of speaking too quickly.

She became even more nervous when Professor Flitwick frowned at her. "What modification is that, dear?"

"The…" she had to swallow the sudden lump in her throat. She could feel her face blushing yet again with embarrassment. Now she had gained the attention of almost everyone within the immediate seats of her. Even some of the other professors were watching her. "The modification in Wingardium Leviosa."

He looked even more confused now. She wouldn't be surprised if he started to scratch his head. Olivia was deeply regretting asking about this. Obviously she should have had this conversation in private since Professor Flitwick was either very slow, or really didn't know about it. Either of these two would end in his shame at being uneducated. She really should have done this in private.

"I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to clarify. I'm still not sure what you are talking about," he said with an apologetic smile that didn't quite mask his confusion and slight irritation.

"The modification that causes the item to hang in the air without actually using the hover charm. It allows you to lift as well as hover the object but with just the one levitation charm," she explained, clasping her hands together in her lap to keep them from shaking. She could see the confusion clearing from his eyes but it was being replaced by pity. Something was going wrong.

"Oh, yes, I understand now. Dear, which one of the seventh years told you of this modification?" He said with a small laugh, looking towards one of his fellow teachers. The potions master. "Professor Windell, your Slytherin's are telling more and more outrageous lies as the years pass."

Now it was Olivia's turn to be confused. What was he talking about? Her lips puckered just the slightest at her confusion as Flitwick turned back to her with that pitying smile still stuck to his face.

"My dear, I don't know who told you about this so called modification, but it doesn't exist. No spell has a modification. There are varying intensities of the spell, which causes it to be more or less powerful, depending on what is needed. But there are no modifications to speak of."

"But I—" she began but was cut off. Flitwick, it seemed wanted to redeem himself for his earlier confusion by fully explaining the truth to her. Or the truth as he believed it to be.

"There is the possibility of making the object levitate at such an incredibly slow rate that it appears to not be moving at all. But as soon as you take your focus off of it, the object will come down, just as if you made it levitate at a normal pace. There is no way to make it hover without adding in the separate spell."

"But there is! You can make the object hover as well as take your focus away from the object. Even cast different spells while the object is in the air. Then, when you are ready for the object to come back down, you simply pick up the thread of magic once more with your magic and take it back down with a reverse wand motion. It's all in the pronunciation as well as a final jabbing motion."

Even as she was speaking, Professor Flitwick was shaking his head in denial. He refused to even listen to her explanation, which caused anger to replace her sudden embarrassment. How could he not eve hear her out? Was he so sure of his own intelligence that he couldn't even consider for a second that he wasn't right?

"Whoever told you this must have been very convincing," he said as Olivia was trying to decide which object she would use to prove to him that the modification was possible. She had done it.

However, at that very moment, he did the one thing that sent her over the edge. He laughed and then turned away from her, dismissing her as if she was beneath his notice. The people who had been listening to the exchange laughed as well and she felt them dismissing her in their mind also. No one dismissed her, not when she knew that she was right. Knew it to her very depths.

Pulling her wand from her pocket, Olivia rose calming to her feet, pointed her wand and declared quite proudly, "Wingardium Leviosa!"

With the proper pronunciation, the added emphasis on the S, and the slight jab of her wand, Professor Flitwick rose neatly from his chair until he rested several feet above his seat. And then he hovered as Olivia sat back down in her seat, picked up her fork and took a healthy bite of cheesecake.

"This cake is excellent Teddy," Olivia said as she set down both her fork and her wand, turning to Teddy with a smile, dismissing _Flitwick_. A smug smile was on her face as she looked up at Teddy, expecting praise for her actions. He however, was staring in horror at the head of the table that was now behind her.

"Set him back down!" A voice said quite loudly, sending her nerves afire. It filled the sudden silence that surrounded her. No one dared move let alone breath as the professor hovered harmlessly in the air. Olivia reasoned to herself that she had simply been proving a point, educating really. There was no reason for her to get in trouble, no not at all. There was no reason to be afraid. She was simply doing what she had felt was needed. Logically, she had done nothing wrong.

Olivia, however, refused to let her fear show, something she had become quite good at. With extremely calm movements, she folded her hands in her lap and looked to the head of the table. Headmaster McGonagall had risen to her feet and was giving her the most stern and frightening glare she had, likely, ever received in her life. "Immediately!"

"Of course Headmaster," Olivia said demurely, as she picked up her wand, found the thread of magic that connected to where the professor hovered and took control of it once more with her wand. With as much grace as she had placed the professor in the air, she jabbed lightly at him and reversed the wand movement. Professor Flitwick floated slowly through the air and landed without so much as a bump back in his chair. No one made a sound.

Then Flitwick was laughing and clapping and the students were laughing too. And noise was filling the hall once more as the professor looked at her and smiled such a wide smile. Olivia couldn't logically figure out why he had reacted that way. She may have reasoned herself into believing that she wouldn't be in trouble, but that had been a bluff. Deep down she had expected herself to be in a very big heap of trouble.

"I've never," exclaimed the headmaster from where she stood at the head of the table, "in all my time as a teacher, seen a student have so much gall as to cast a charm intentionally on a teacher. What is your name?"

As the words thundered down the table, Olivia called on her bluff once more. Standing she stood tall and proud, forcing her shoulders back and her chin up. "Olivia Ballentine."

"What house are you in Olivia," Flitwick asked standing up also and coming around to her side of the table, completely ignoring the seething woman that stood just a few seats from him.

"What does it matter—"

"Yours, Professor. A first year," Olivia said, following him with her eyes as he rounded the table and headed right for her.

"Yes, yes I should have known. That was most extraordinary!" He exclaimed as he finally reached her. He grabbed her wand free hand and began to shake it vigorously. "Never in my life have I been so surprised, nor so pleased to have a spell cast upon me."

"Professor, she has still broken an untold amount of rules! She will have to be dis—"

"The spell was cast so gently. Sometimes it can be quite jarring to be lifted into the air that way, or to have a spell placed on you at all. But your spell, why, it was like being lifted up by the wind. And the hover, like sitting on clouds. And then to actually break wand connection!"

He was still holding her hand, but now he was leading her slowly from the hall, talking the entire time, a fire in his eyes. Much the same fire that Olivia felt herself when she was studying. A fire to learn, to understand.

"I literally saw you break wand connection, yet you were able to hold the spell within your mind. I know you think of it as dropping the spell, when you release your wand, but really, the wand is just a tool for what the mind already does. To hold that kind of a spell in your mind, amazing."

"Thank you Professor—"

"But what is truly miraculous, is that you were correct! You did modify the spell. You used the levitation charm, but you were able to make it hover as well. Truly amazing. And a first year at that. You must tell me of how you did it, how you even thought to do it. It was in the pronunciation?"

"Yes, Professor. And in the wand movement," Olivia said as she was brought before a door. She would soon come to find this place one of her favorite rooms within the castle.

Flitwick had brought her to his private office. There was a large oak desk directly across from the door, with a rather comfy armchair off to the side of it, which Flitwick ushered her to. As she sat down he went to light the fire that was behind her desk and Olivia examined the portraits that covered the walls. They were all of famous witches and wizards, some of which Olivia recognized from her studies. All of them famous for their Charm work.

"You must show me, Olivia. I am most interested in knowing," Flitwick said as he sat in the chair behind his desk and looked at her intently, still with that so familiar glint in his eye. "Start with the pronunciation. That's always been where I've struggled the most."

With a small smile, Olivia launched into an explanation of performing the modification, all thoughts of her remaining cheesecake gone.

This truly was a better Christmas then she ever could have hoped for.

A/N Review please! :D


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four:

After Christmas, the time seemed to fly by for Olivia, even though things had changed slightly. She spent almost a month and a half teaching Professor Flitwick the modification to the hover charm, and he said that he would submit her findings to the Ministry of Magic under her name, to see if it could be added to the curriculum.

He had explained that to his knowledge, no modification had ever been taught, or found furthermore, in a ministry-approved class. And while he assured her that he found her to be absolutely brilliant, he didn't want to lose his job just yet.

Olivia completely agreed with him, and in fact, had asked that her name not be mentioned in the inquiry to the Ministry, but Flitwick had refused to deny her the credit that was rightfully hers and had sent it anyways.

Olivia had had several ideas for other modifications that could be possible, most of which she had yet to try out due to an increase in homework for coming exams. Professor Flitwick had asked what these ideas were, but she didn't share. She wanted to get her hands on the project first. It was, after all, her idea.

Classes had changed for her since Christmas, but not in the way she had expected. After her stunt at the Christmas feast, which Flitwick had been able to talk McGonagall out of punishing her based on the fact that it was an amazing display of magical talent, teachers had begun to pay more attention to her. Her face had finally been connected to her name on the papers she handed in, and many of the professors were seeing her as the talented student she was.

Often times they would call on her for the answers, even though she hadn't raised her hand. At first, this had been very startling. So startling in fact, that the first time she had heard her name called, she had sat up straight from the hunch she had affected over her notes on the desk, blinked owlishly at Professor Flitwick from behind her glasses, and said, in quite a scratchy voice, "Me?"

"Yes you," he had exclaimed over the sudden roar of laughter, and even though Olivia's face turned red and she sunk a little lower in her seat, she recited a very clever answer, including what the textbook had said, as well as her own take on the spell and how she found it most helpful if you moved your wand with more of a swish then a flick. That had stopped the laughter.

But it wasn't just Professor Flitwick. In potions, Professor Windell had asked her what she thought of the use of powdered unicorn horn in the healing potion they were working on. And in transfiguration, she was asked to perform her version of the spell in front of the entire class because Professor Kinsley had watched her and noticed that her wand movement was the most refined and wanted her to demonstrate for others.

There were several other times that Olivia was called upon, and she was beginning to fear she was being regarded as a know it all, but actually, she had become somewhat of a legend.

No one, not since Fred and George Weasley of course, had had the gall to perform spells on teachers. Of course, when Fred and George had done it, it had been for a righteous cause, and it was rumored that no one really liked that teacher anyway. But the two would have been expelled for what happened if they hadn't left willingly. And they were known for that sort of thing, Olivia had been told, so most of them hadn't been surprised.

Olivia's case was entirely different. She had performed magic on a teacher, magic that was rumored to be lasting and dangerous, and had gotten away with it. Of course, the rumors were outrageous and untrue, but no matter what Olivia heard, she saw no conclusive way of disproving it, so she didn't waste her energy.

For the first few weeks after the students had returned from Christmas break, they had whispered and pointed at her wherever she went. Some of the older year boys had even asked to shake her hand for they found her to be most admirable. She had blushed profusely at this, stammered thanks, and rushed on to class.

The hubbub around her died rather quickly, but the damage had been done. People noticed her now, a lot more then they had before. They asked her for help in class, and if they had questions on homework, they easily sought her out in the library to ask her. She became known as one of the smarter students in the first year group, but it wasn't, strangely, a bad thing.

Back in her old school, Olivia had always feared being seen as one of the smart kids. They were often picked on or made fun of, and usually had no friends. At Hogwarts, it was different. The students seemed to appreciate that she was smart, they didn't feel like it was overbearing. Olivia assumed it was because she was modest about it, tried to hide it away. She didn't flaunt her intelligence. Simply believed in it. For that reason, students felt comfortable seeking out her help.

She still didn't have friends though. Not that she minded. Olivia found that it was easier to study if she didn't have friends. After Christmas break, her year mates had tried the whole friend thing a second time. Sitting by her in class, next to her at lunches, even following her to the library and finding seats among the stacks of books that frequented her table. However, all of the talking was distracting and she stopped joining in once she found a book on stealth spells. She had been toying with the idea for Lumos. What if she could cause some other object to be the source of the light, not just the tip of her wand?

The attempt at friendship lasted about as long as the rumors, and soon Olivia was by herself at the table once more, though the girls were still friendly towards her. However, she wasn't alone in the library. Soon, it became a popular place, for all year levels, as the exams were coming up rather quickly.

Olivia wasn't worried. She studied just like always, her usual amount. And when she sat down for the end of the year exams, she didn't find them to be all that difficult. In fact, her biggest problem was the time constraint, as she found herself explaining rather a lot and running out of time towards the end.

Then before she knew it, Olivia was packing her trunks and heading out of the castle for the train. The school year was over and it was time to return home. At first, she felt a sort of pang at having to leave Hogwarts. She had been informed, like every other student, that she was not allowed to use magic outside of school grounds and so must retire her wand until the end of the summer.

She felt for sure that she wouldn't be able to follow this rule. Magic was so deeply apart of her that the thought of not feeling it working, not having the wand vibrating in her hand as she cast a spell, would drive her crazy before long. Added to that losing the library and her constant source of knowledge, and Olivia was quite sad to leave.

It wasn't until she was on the train, however, that she began to get nervous. She had developed a little bit of a reputation over the course of the year. What would they think if they knew of her past, of her family? What would they think if her mother showed up to take her away, covered in bruises? Or if her stepfather came, yelling and ranting, swinging his fists? What would they think if both of them were there?

Olivia felt her hands begin to shake again, and that deep despair that hadn't been with her since Christmas, came crawling back in. As she sat on the bench within her tiny, empty, train compartment, she ran through all the scenarios in her head of how she could be greeted at the train station in just a few hours time, and none of them were good. None at all.

"May I sit here?" a voice called breaking into her reverie. She turned to the door and there stood Teddy Lupin. She almost smiled as she looked up at him. It seemed he said that to her a lot.

"Sure," she whispered as he sat down beside her and Dylan and Roger filed in behind. They immediately launched themselves into talk of summer vacation and the plans they had made, but Olivia remained silent. What plans would she have? Hiding away in her room was one, keeping her mother from being beaten too badly was another.

Obviously not the most pleasant thoughts she had ever had. But it was hard to go back to that kind of life after so many months of goodness. She felt guilty for not wanting to return. Shouldn't she want to be with her mother?

And it wasn't that she didn't want to be with her mother. She did! She missed her mother so much that sometimes it was a physical ache. Olivia just wished that she could have her mother and her magic too.

"What about you Olivia?" Teddy asked, breaking into her thoughts. She wondered why it was that he always tried to get her to join in the conversation. Didn't he realize she was perfectly content with just sitting there, letting the noise become background to her thoughts?

"What about me?" She asked in a slightly dreamy voice as she turned her eyes away from the moving landscape and looked around at the compartment. Somehow she had zoned out for the take off of the train, just as she had on the way into school.

"Do you have any plans for the summer?"

Olivia thought of her mother and of her stepfather and of what she would be returning to once more, then slowly shook her head. "Just the usual summer boredom, I guess."

"My family and I are going to this really neat lake for a few weeks in July. You can come if you like," Teddy offered. A gasp turned Olivia's head towards Roger and she watched as a shocked expression crossed his face.

"But you never—"

"Shut up Roger!" Dylan barked, as Roger ogled between the two of them. Olivia wondered slightly at this, but then Dylan engaged Roger in a more interesting conversation at something called Quidditch and Teddy repeated his question.

She pursed her lips in consideration. A lake? That meant swimming. Swimming meant bathing suits. And bathing suits revealed far too much skin, skin that would more likely then not have acquired several bruises.

It wasn't that her stepfather beat her regularly, not at all. When he hit her, if ever on purpose, it was often as an after thought, or because her mother wasn't within reach during one of his rages. No, all her bruises came from trying to defend her mother. She often got in the way of his punches.

"If you're worried about being the only girl, Victoire will be there. And so will my Aunt Ginny and Aunt Hermoine. It's not like you'll be alone. There's no need to be shy. You would have lots of fun!" Teddy nudged her elbow playfully, teasing a smile out of her serous expression.

It did sound like fun. But her mother needed her.

"It is very tempting. It's not that I'm shy, it's just that…" she paused here, not knowing what to say, or how to explain it in a way that it wouldn't seem as bad as it was.  
"My mother gets sick often, and I want to be there in case she needs me. I'll ask when we reach King's Cross, but I doubt she'll agree."

"Maybe if she talks to my grandmother, she'll be more lenient. What's your address? I'll owl you," Teddy began to rummage in his pocket for a piece of parchment and a quill.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea…" Olivia began. An owl showing up at her window? Or even worse, her mother's? Her stepfather would go ballistic.

"Why not?" Teddy asked as he set the parchment against his leg, ready to write. Olivia couldn't think up a suitable lie for this, and in fact, didn't really want to lie to Teddy at all. He was such a nice boy. He seemed to see her hesitation. "How about if you owl me then?"

"I don't own an owl."

"Then I'll have to send you the owl. What is your address?" With a sigh, Olivia gave it up to him. Even as she said it aloud, she could feel a doom settle on her shoulders. This would end badly. She slumped back into her seat and let out a sad sigh. It wasn't Teddy's fault; he just wanted to be friends. But didn't he understand she wasn't the type of girl he wanted to be friends with? She was bad news.

Teddy must have seen her lowered spirits, for he suggested a game of exploding snap. After spending several minutes explaining the rules to her, the three boys and Olivia spent the rest of the train ride playing.

Before she knew it, the train was sitting in the station and Teddy was pulling her out of her seat and into the aisle. Olivia lost him in the flood of the students, but she didn't mind. Hopefully, if she moved fast enough, she could get her things onto a trolley, find her mother and/or stepfather and disappear before anyone saw her.

She succeeded in securing her trunk rather fast, as she wasn't hindered by a clinging family that surrounded her with hugs and kisses and thousands of questions of how their school year had been and proclamations of "love you" and "missed you". She easily escaped through the crowd and out into King's Cross, but there her plan of escaping quickly came to a screeching halt.

No one was there to meet her.

With a frown, Olivia wove her way through the crowd, thinking perhaps she just couldn't see her mother with the hordes of students and families milling around the station. But a circuit of the interior and there was still no sign of her mother.

Perhaps they were waiting outside? But walking into the sunlight did nothing but cause her to blink. Her mother wasn't there either. How odd. Did she forget what day it was? Did she not realize that today was the day Olivia came home? Or there was traffic. Yes that had to be it. Traffic.

Olivia waited outside for quite some time, watching the students with the happy families going. She noticed several different methods of travel, the most popular of which appeared to be Apparation. One moment the students with his or her mother or father were walking quietly into a darkened alleyway, the next moment they were gone. Olivia found the process of Apparation fascinating and determined that she would dedicate several months when she turned of age mastering that skill. She believed it would be essential at some point.

When the heat became too much for her, Olivia wandered back inside and found a bench to sit on. She tried, very hard, not to look at the clock on the wall behind her, but she couldn't resist, and she turned and looked, realizing she had been at the station for almost two hours.

At this point, there were no more students leaving. No more families, and most of the trains had left for other journeys. There was no one left inside, really, other then the people who worked at the station. Olivia was beginning to worry. This wasn't traffic. No, this was something else. What if her mother really had forgotten about her? Or worse? What if her mother hadn't forgotten? What if she simply couldn't come because something had happened to her?

In her worry, Olivia began to chew on her lower lip, picking at the skin with her teeth until it broke and bleed. She watched the revolving doors to the station obsessively as images crowded inside her head. Not just imagined ones, though those were in there too, but real ones, ones that she had seen with her own eyes.

Her mother with a bloodied lip, her eyes blackened. The time she had her arm put in a cast. A flash of bruised flesh across her ribs the time he had come home drunk from the bar and used his boots against her. So many images, so many horrors. Which one was the case this time?

Tears began to flood Olivia's eyes, and she sniffed them back bravely, wanting to appear calm incase her stepfather showed up. She couldn't allow him to see how scared she really was. If he felt the fear in her, she would no longer be able to fly under his radar, or be as unnoticeable as before.

A movement close to her left side had her looking away from her constant vigilance of the doors. Only instinct stopped her from whipping her head around to see what it was. Moving just her eyes, she saw Teddy headed past her with an elderly woman who looked strongly of him. They had the same eyes, she noticed immediately, though Teddy had more of a wolfish look about his face.

They were approaching almost even with her now. Teddy was facing forward, towards the doors. Maybe he wouldn't see her. Olivia concentrated as hard as she could on blending in to her surroundings. If she concentrated hard enough, she was certain she would blend right in with the bench and he would walk right by without seeing her.

"…sounds like a lovely girl, Teddy," said the elderly woman with a knowing smile on her face. Knowing what, Olivia was uncertain. Teddy obviously didn't know either, for he turned to the woman to see if he could find the answer in her face. Olivia held her breath, praying now. She didn't want him to know that no one had come for her.

"What do you mean Grandma… Olivia?" Shoot.

Olivia exhaled loudly, before settling into the inevitable. For some reason, Teddy just couldn't leave her alone like she wanted to be. He always had to come and see what was wrong, or if he could sit with her, or try and get her to talk. Couldn't he just figure it out already? She wasn't friend material.

"Hello, Teddy. Who is this?" Olivia asked in a rather dry voice as Teddy walked the few feet to where she was sitting and frowned down at her.

"What are you still doing here? It's been nearly three hours since the train arrived. I thought you were long gone." He frowned harder at her, looking at her face, the redness to her eyes that suggested her tears, the dried blood on her lip from where she had chewed that showed her worry. The way she tried to look brave but how her eyes betrayed her. "What's wrong?"

"Teddy, don't be rude!" The woman with him chuckled softly before holding out her hand for Olivia to shake. "I'm his Grandmother, Mrs. Tonks. And you are?"

"Olivia Ballentine."

"Olivia, what's wrong? Why are you still here?" Teddy demanded, his thin face set in a frown, his too long canine teeth flashing through his words. He sat down on the bench beside her and reached out for her hands, covering them where they twisted in her lap.

"What are _you _doing here?" Olivia demanded in return, trying to remove his hands from hers, but he clutched in just such a way that she couldn't quite break his grip.

"Grandma is a Muggle. She has to drive here and it's a bit far. Took her longer then she expected," he said with a shrug, but Olivia could tell that he hadn't finished questioning her.

"Would you like us to wait with you for your parents, my dear?" Mrs. Tonks offered as she smiled down with her old woman smile. She didn't know of horrors in this world, not with that kind of a smile. No, she couldn't possibly know. It was best that she didn't expose them to this.

"No, that's quite alright. I'm certain that my parents are on their way right now. In fact, they'll probably be here any minute. You go on ahead," she tried to give them a convincing smile, but she could see that though it worked on Mrs. Tonks, Teddy was yet to be convinced. Why was he such a pest?

"Well, if you're sure, dear," Mrs. Tonks said and patted her knee, before getting creakily to her feet. "I'll just go get the car. Teddy, love, why don't you wait here with Livy?"

"Yes, Grandma," Teddy smiled but his eyes remained serious and on her face. Olivia's sixth sense for danger began to tingle. Oh no, she thought as she pulled at her hands. Something was about to go terribly wrong.

"Where's your parents Olivia? Why haven't they come to get you yet?" Teddy asked in a quiet voice. Olivia felt a lump rising in her throat, the same one she experienced any time someone tried to dig too deep.

"Where's yours?" She fired back, tugging harder. She was beginning to panic. Something was coming. She could feel each step closer it took in shivers down her spine.

"They're dead." He said it so matter of factly that for a moment, Olivia stopped thinking about herself and felt true sadness for Teddy. It must have been hard to lose them.

"I'm sorry," she said, sincerely. Then she heard it. The faintest whisper that sounded like her name. She startled and looked towards the door, the direction from which she had heard the sound coming. And she saw her mother, standing there with the oddest expression on her face, her blue eyes so huge and intense.

Olivia forgot to struggle out of Teddy's grip as she felt warmth flood her insides. So long, was her only thought as she stared at the expression on her mother's face that had once been so familiar. And now she was here, finally. She was here.

A smile broke across her face, so wide she thought the muscles in her face would break from disuse. But then they were warming up to the smile and it didn't hurt anymore. Nothing hurt anymore. Everything was wonderful.

Teddy was taken aback by the look on her face. He had never seen her smile that way before. He found that he preferred when she smiled like that. When she looked happy. And he realized that she wasn't happy at school. She had never, ever, looked like this at school before. What was it that made her this way?

"Olivia."

And just like that, it was gone. Like the flick of a light switch. Teddy watched, fascinated, as the smile dropped from her face. Her eyes moved in a jerking motion from the doors behind his shoulder, to directly beside where he was standing. Then they traveled up and up, and opened so wide behind those thin framed glasses that sat so cutely on her face.

And then the hands he was holding began to shake, shake so hard it was a wonder to him that they didn't just come apart. And her whole body was shaking and that expression on her face was one of barely contained fear. Her mouth opened just the slightest, trying to admit some sound of distress and managing only to exhale.

"What—" He began, wanting to question what had brought on this change.

"We're leaving!" A voice shouted. And a hand was crossing his vision. A big hand, three times the size of his own. It gripped Olivia's arm and jerked her clear off the seat, off her feet, until she was standing beside the huge man. That was Teddy's first impression of Olivia's stepfather. The man was huge. He was taller then Teddy believed men could be, though maybe it was just the air of intimidation that hung from him that made him seem so tall. His body was corded with muscles that added to the force he exuded.

When Teddy managed to tear his eyes away from the giant of a man, it was to see Olivia hanging from his grip, her arm raised painfully, her face twisted in a wince. She was still shaking; he could see the fine trembles from where he sat.

She had just enough time to grab the handle of her trolley and then the man was dragging her away, without so much as a goodbye. Before Teddy knew what was happening Olivia was gone.

A/N review please! =]


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five: Second Year

Olivia Ballentine was returning to Hogwarts once more to begin her second year. Towards the end of her first year, she had allowed herself to believe that this time it would be easier to leave her mother, this time it wouldn't hurt as much to say goodbye. This time she wouldn't drown in the guilt.

She had thought that her love of magic, of exploring the different aspects and avenues of her spell casting would pull her back to this school, to this life. She had believed, foolishly, that things would be different.

But they weren't.

She had arrived at King's Cross well ahead of the rest of her fellow students. Hours early. Her stepfather still didn't know of her true school's identity. The year before her mother had decided this time it really was best to lie. He believed she had been accepted into a private school on the other side of the country. That didn't, however, mean he approved of her going to school at all. He was of the firm belief that if it inconvenienced him, it was wrong.

Therefore, Olivia needing a ride to the station at the same time he wanted the car for his own use, was an inconvenience, and hence, wrong. An argument had ensued, one that was heated, violent. Olivia had rushed to her mother's defense and things had escalated even further. She had gotten into the thick of the fight and been dealt several severe blows.

In the end, the fight had stopped when two cops knocked on the door. It seems the neighbors, who had called the cops on them, had heard the shouting. Her stepfather had glared them into silence as he went to open the door, and Olivia had used that chance to escape, dragging her mother into her bedroom, closing and locking them in, safe. Her stepfather was probably too drunk by this point to remember that they were even arguing. Once the police left, he would go back to watching his show, and everything would be fine once more.

The fight had had its effects, despite the seemingly winning outcome, both physically and mentally. Olivia had been dropped off at the train station at eight in the morning, after a hurried breakfast. Her mother had wanted to get the car back home before her stepfather noticed it was gone.

There had been the tearful goodbye in the car, of course, the hugs and the kisses, and her mother had begged Olivia once more to study as hard as she could and not to worry about her. She had explained, in a tone that Olivia had trouble believing, that she was the source of her mother and stepfather's arguments, the majority of the time. With her out of the house, most of the tension was gone. That Olivia really had nothing to worry about.

But Olivia had seen the look in her mother's eye, that tiny little glint of guilt and she had known she was being told lies. However, there was nothing she could do, not now, that would help her mother at all. Coming back home would only make it worse. Her stepfather expected her to be gone. If she remained at the house, he would be furious.

So Olivia had stepped quietly from the car, walked into the station, taken a seat on the bench, and planned. She reviewed all the defensive spells she had read of the year before, all the protection spells she could remember. And she decided that she didn't know nearly enough.

She wanted to be able to protect her mother, even when she wasn't at home. Perhaps there was spell hidden within the library that would allow her to do that. Maybe she would even be able to complete the spell before the year was up. Her mother could possibly be safe by the time Olivia had returned home.

This thought had cheered her slightly, but she had still snuck onto the train almost an hour early and claimed the very last compartment on the train for herself. The reflection that looked back at her from the window showed her battle wounds and she new that if she were to be seen questions would be asked, questions she didn't feel like answering. It was best if she just hid away like this, away from prying eyes. Then everything would be fine.

She thought things were going to go as she had planned when the train pulled out from the station and she had yet to see any of her fellow students. She saw the landscapes outside her window begin to move faster and faster until it was a blur and she finally allowed herself to relax.

With a sigh she sunk down low in her seat, rested her head against the back of the cushion and closed her eyes, letting words from some of her more favored spell dance across the back of her eyelids. Olivia, while she may have had a very busy summer protecting her mother, hadn't given up her studies completely. She had been able to recite the incantations aloud, as well as do the wand movement without the wand in her hand. Through this practice, she had been able to stay sharp.

She was just about to dig through her trunks to find her most beloved wand when sudden footsteps approached her door. As if in slow motion, Olivia watched the door to her compartment slide effortlessly open to reveal the one person she truly hadn't wished to see.

"Let me guess," Olivia said as she watched Teddy Lupin open his mouth to speak. She knew what he was going to say. Didn't he always say it? Why was it he was always in need of a seat when she was near? What was it about her that gave him the over whelming urge to sit down? "You need a place to sit."

"The other compartments are full," Teddy said, but this time it was without the smile that usually accompanied the situation. He almost always approached her with a certain carefree attitude, and a grin that made her feel as if they were sharing some inside joke. Today he stared at her solemnly, almost with a sadness.

Olivia wondered if it had anything to do with their owls over the summer.

Much to her chagrin, Teddy had owled her within the first week of the summer. He had spent several paragraphs describing his Grandmother and her strange Muggle habits. Though Olivia had lived her life as a Muggle as well, Teddy's grandmother had seemed quite out there to her. He had then gone on to tell her about the coming trip to the lake he had mentioned and then he had asked her how her summer had been so far and if she had spoken to her mother about accompanying him on the trip.

Luckily for Olivia the owl had arrived while her stepfather had been out and she had been able to scribble a hasty reply before shooing the animal out her window. She vaguely recalled telling him somewhat of her mother and a little of how she had decided to practice her magic through theory for the summer.

Olivia had received several more owls for the next month and a half and she had begun to respond with actual letters, not just a sentence or two. She had even begun to enjoy writing to Teddy. It was fun to have someone to talk to. Someone who didn't know of the horror that she went through on a daily basis. Someone who wasn't tainted by her every day life.

And then, mid June, all hell had broken loose. She had received an owl, early in the morning, before her stepfather had woken from his drunken stupor. Being as the house was quiet, Olivia had written back an equally as long letter and sent the owl back to Teddy. In the past, the letters she had received had been one or two days apart. So after sending her letter she had gone on with her normal habits.

She and her mother had cleaned up the house, first doing the regular chores that her stepfather demanded be done and then moving on to the extra work. Dinner the night before hadn't been the most pleasant of affairs and several stains had come into effect during the performance. After several hours of scrubbing it was decided that tougher cleaning supplies were needed for this and Olivia had gotten into the car with her mother and set out to the store.

It was while she was away that the worst possible thing had happened, the thing she had feared the most. Teddy, in his over eagerness to have an answer to whether or not she would be able to come to the lake, had done away with writing her an actual letter and had instead written her a note. That note had arrived at her house via owl some time while she and her mother had been at the store.

The owl, she was assuming, had gone first to her window and after tapping several times and being ignored as her room had been empty, it had tried a different window. That window had belonged to the living room, where her stepfather had been sitting, drinking his afternoon beer and watching the sports channel. After trying to ignore the incessant tapping and failing, which sparked his temper, he had stormed to the window expecting to see hoodlums, or so Olivia imagined in her mind. Of course, he was quite shocked and possibly startled to find the owl, which angered him further.

At that point he needed an outlet for his anger, and since the owl deposited the note and left, he couldn't find that necessary outlet. So his anger grew. And in his building rage he had read the note, realized it was for none other then his burden of a stepdaughter, and found his next target.

He had sat at the door and waited, ever so patiently, for his wife and stepdaughter to return home, un-expecting of what was to come. He had waited, and plotted, and when the door had swung open on a happy little scene of mother and daughter, the monster had attacked, and the nightmare had reigned once more.

Olivia winced at the memory, which caused the cut on her lip to split back open and sluggishly ooze blood. She watched Teddy's eyes fall to the blood like a bright red beacon on her face, exposing her life for what it was. She couldn't bear it, couldn't bear to have him know the truth. It hurt too much. Olivia pushed her thin-rimmed glasses up on her nose and spoke her nerves into the quiet.

"Where are you friends, Dylan and Roger?" She cleared her throat. It hurt to use today. Probably dehydration. She had hid away in her room for the majority of the day before. And the small glass of orange juice she had guzzled down at breakfast hadn't helped much.

Teddy didn't say anything, just looked at her for a long time, studying the bruises on her face, trying to memorize them. Olivia knew what he saw. She had studied it many times in the window since boarding the train.

Her black curls framed her thin face, her cheeks hollowed out. The right side of her face was red and puffy with a purple bruise all along her cheekbone, glaring out from under her skin. The thin-framed glasses didn't hide anything, least of all the dark shadows in and under her eyes. Her lip was puffy as well and bleeding now from the cut that had opened back up. Olivia had tasted the blood when she had licked her dry lips.

What was he thinking she wondered. Just standing there, staring. Was he trying to figure out the nicest way possible of leaving? Surely, now that he had seen what she truly was, the kind of life she lived, the people she came from, he would give up all his attempts to see her. All his attempts to be friends with her, for she saw now that's what he had been trying to do. He had been trying to be friends, but not anymore. Now he would run from her.

As if to prove her thoughts right she saw him turn his back to her and reach for the door. Olivia closed her eyes as she heard the rattle as it slide closed. A small pull at her heart had her wincing. She hadn't known it before, but Teddy really had been the closest thing she had to a friend, her first and only friend. And even though she hadn't understood why he felt the need to be her friend, or had really tried to reciprocate it, she had become used to it. It would be strange not to have him always trying to sit with her, or talk to her. Or write her those damning letters.

Olivia was startled out of her thoughts when she felt a touch upon her face. Her eyes flew open to meet Teddy's warm brown ones, serious and concentrated on her bruises. Her breath clogged in her throat as she held herself perfectly still, afraid to move, afraid to breathe. No one touched her, ever. This was so foreign to her, so completely out of her range of knowledge that she didn't know how to react or what to feel.

Sure, her mother touched her, but that was her mother. And it was her mother, and it was so easy, so natural, to wrap her arms around her thin little body and hug back. Then there was her step-father, but did his punches really count? No one other then that, tried to show comfort or affection. Not a classmate, a teacher, not anyone.

Teddy must have read the shock in her eyes for he dropped his hand and took the seat beside her, closest to the door. Closest to escape? But then he leaned just the slightest bit towards her so their shoulders touched.

"Why did you stop writing to me?" Teddy asked into the quiet of the train car. Olivia had started to breath again but she still couldn't fathom Teddy's touch. Her entire shoulder was tingling from it, radiating warmth from the contact. It was unlike anything she had felt from her mother's touches. Certainly not like her stepfathers. What was this?

"Was it because of this?" Teddy prodded, reaching up and touching her face gently. This time Olivia twisted her face out of his grasp, not wanting to feel what he made her feel anymore. Comfort. Sympathy. Understanding. Belonging?

"No, this was an accident," Olivia said at last, surprised by her own voice. She hadn't expected herself to say anything. In fact, she had planned on ignoring him all together. The fact that she had not only talked to him, but volunteered him the truth was shocking. If he knew the truth, he would walk away from her, wouldn't he? He wouldn't want to be friends with someone like her, she was certain.

"Then why did you stop writing to me?" Teddy asked in that same tone. It seemed to her as if it was filled with the utmost patience. As if he was waiting for her to realize she could trust him. She figured he would have a very long wait.

"My stepfather doesn't like owls. When he found out I was using yours to send you letters, he forbid me to have any contact with you. When your next letter arrived, he sent the owl away and burned the letter before I had a chance to read it."

Well, it wasn't exactly a lie. Her stepfather had burned all the letters Teddy had sent her after he had first discovered the owl. But he hadn't forbidden her to speak to Teddy so much as he had terrified her into believing that if she wrote another letter to Teddy, her stepfather would kill either her or her mother.

Teddy didn't say anything after that explanation. He sat for a very long time, what felt like an eternity to Olivia, very still and quiet, his shoulder still pressing lightly against hers, sending that rhythm to her heart. Soon, though she thought it would have been impossible, Olivia began to relax into his touch. Her head leaned back against the seat and the fatigue that she had been pushing away came back. The blue eyes that Teddy found so fascinating began to close and before she knew it, she felt herself drifting into sleep.

"Olivia…" Teddy whispered as he felt more of the girl's weight settle onto him. He felt more then heard her murmured response and knew that if he ever was going to find out the truth, now was the moment. "Did your stepfather give you those bruises?"

Her sigh might have been a yes, might have been a no. But Teddy was fairly certain that he was correct. Since the moment he had seen the imposing giant of a man stalking through the train station to drag Olivia away, Teddy had known this man was the cause for Olivia's nagging sadness. And the bruises he had spied on her wrist in first year. With the look he had seen on that giant's eyes, how could it not be?

When her letters had stopped coming over the summer, he had feared something terrible had happened.

Olivia, with her frail figure and haunting blue eyes, brought out this protective nature. He felt like she needed someone to save her from the predators of the world, and for some reason, he felt the urge to be that someone.

Since Teddy had been a little boy, his grandmother had told him again and again of how she and his grandfather had meet. She said she had been sitting in a coffee shop, minding her own, when suddenly his granfather had taken a seat at her table and demanded her attention. From that point on, they had been inseperable. Teddy had often asked why his grandfather had taken her seat, done what he had done. She had explained that her grandfather was a firm believer in gut instincts. And he had said the moment he had laid eyes on his future wife, his gut had told him that she was the one. There had been no question, no second guessing for him. He had made his move and hadn't looked back.

Teddy had come to believe in the same philosophy. Thus his attarction to Olivia. From the moment he had first set eyes on Olivia, all by chance of course, he had known she was someone who would be in his life forever. Friendship, or more, he didn't care. He simply knew he had to talk to her.

And as she gave into her wariness of him and allowed herself to trust, just the littlest bit, Teddy knew he wasn't making a mistake in befriending this girl, in "wasting his time on a silly shy girl" as his friends put it. They just couldn't see what he saw in her. But he would forgive them that, just as he would forgive Olivia for her constant need to push him away.

* * *

Once Olivia arrived at the school with the rest of her fellow students, it seemed to her as if time flew. She barely registered her embarrassed stammer at Teddy about being tired and not meaning to use him as a pillow, and then she was in the Great Hall, under that magical sky that brought back the realities of what she was becoming.

She had flown through her meal and then snuck off to the library to check out her first book, a book on the method for charming objects and she had spent her first night as a second year student huddled beneath her blanket with her Lumos-ed wand lighting up the pages.

Before long Olivia was engrossed in her studies in classes, filling pages and pages of parchment with her own intake and ideas of lectures held by teachers. She was once again excelling in class, having spent the first few weeks going over the year's materials and using the time in class to expand her own theories of how the spells should be done. She had even started up experimenting on her Lumos modification idea, though as yet it proved to be fruitless.

She saw Teddy a lot during classes and he always nodded hello to her, though he didn't try to strike up a conversation, which she was very grateful for. She had a feeling that if he were to recognize her, even come and talk to her publicly, with his little fan club of cool boys and pretty girls following him, she would be eaten alive. That and she didn't want to be distracted from her work.

And the gaggle of adoring fans that followed him, which started because he was such a funny, charming boy, and grew once he became accepted on his house Quidditch team (a game that still confused and remained uninteresting to Olivia) didn't seem like they would be very accepting of her.

Olivia also received a letter from her mother within the first few weeks of school. It was filled with the usual lies, about how everything was fine at home. How, once she had left for school, the atmosphere at home had settled down slightly. Her stepfather had seemed in a much better temper. However, he wouldn't be leaving for sea until mid march, so Olivia would once again be spending Christmas at Hogwarts. Joy.

In October, near to Halloween, Professor Flitwick called Olivia into his office and informed her of the Ministry's reply to her modification spell of Wingardium Leviosa. The letter that had been sent back to her by ministry officials had been long and filled with big words, legal terms, and unnecessary sentences that did much to confuse her. The translation that she gathered from Professor Flitwick was that after some preliminary testing and mastering of the spell by two select individuals the spell appeared to be authentic and therefore an accomplishment of untold measures for her.

Since it hadn't been tested or mastered by enough wizards and witches, it would not be considered for eligible spells to be learned and was not entered into the school curriculum. However, it would be appearing in a spell book at the first of the next year with her name credited under it. The book was called A Compilation of Newly Discovered Spells. Hers would be appearing on page 23, or so the letter had informed.

While this delighted Professor Flitwick, Olivia wasn't all that enthused about the idea. She had become deeply engrossed in defensive magic and was currently working on a modification for a protection charm she had read about. This modification seemed much more challenging and intricate then the lift and hover she had perfected. She was certain if she were able to pull this one off, her first modification would be left in the dust.

Olivia continued to study the charm and try out different ways of casting it. The practice consumed all her free time after she finished her studies and she fell into a routine of waking up early and staying up very late. She often forgot to eat and forgot that her fellow students actually existed at times. Teddy Lupin was the only one she really noticed on the rare occasion she wasn't in a mental fog. Time passed very quickly for her and before she knew it she was at Christmas break once more.

She didn't receive as many presents this year as she had the last and she gathered that it was because her stepfather was still in town. He wouldn't approve of Olivia receiving Christmas presents when the money could have been spent elsewhere. However, the warm black knit sweater her mother gave her, as well as more school supplies was more then enough to make her happy.

Olivia also was given another mystery gift. This time the item was something that she found fascinating. It was called an ever-lasting notebook. Each page worked very much like an Internet screen on a computer, something she had learned about at her old school's library. As she would write, instead of having to move her hand back and forth across the page, the paper within the notebook would magically move. It would continue to go up and up, giving her as much space as she needed to write on each subject. Later, if she needed to come back to something that had been scrolled up, she simply tapped on the top of the page and her written words would scroll back down.

It soon became her most treasured possession and Olivia carried it with her everywhere.

After Christmas the rest of the school year seemed to go by in a blur. She stayed on top of her studies, excelling in class, and even perfected her protection charm. By the end of April she began looking into how to charm objects. This quickly branched off into learning how to keep a spell on a certain object going without actively concentrating on it, which was essential to her charming objects, she was sure.

The end of school year ride was much the same as the return trip of first year. She sat with Teddy Lupin and his two friends. He asked her if he could write to her once again, though this time with a little more understanding in his eyes. However, since her stepfather was away to sea, Olivia agreed with a smile. She even promised to ask her mother if she could visit the lake with Teddy when he prodded her.

All in all, Olivia felt that her second year at Hogwarts was much the same as her first, if a little less exciting. She planned to enjoy her summer then return for her third year with renewed effort towards building a spell that would keep her mother alive.

A/N The next chapter will be a lot more interesting, I swear. I'll be introducing one of my most favorite characters. She has been described as a "force of pure energy". She's fun. Review me! =]


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six:

As sun crept through the window on Olivia's last day of summer, things were very different then how she would have expected them to be. If she followed the pattern that had been established the last two years, she should have been awakened not happy, but stressed and suffering from an overwhelming sense of guilt. She should not have woken to sunshine, but to a headache and her stomach twisted into knots. In the past, today she would have left her mother for a school year alone with her step-father, her safety uncertain, her fate tangled with despair and pain.

But not this year, not today.

"Livy dear, breakfast," her mother called from the bottom of the stairs. Olivia smiled and stretched her muscles well rested from sleep. Her eyes blinked blurrily at the sunlit room as she reached for her thin framed glasses on the table beside her and sat up, the covers falling away. Her stomach gave a pleasant rumble and she bounced from the bed and down the stairs to the happily humming kitchen. Was this how normal children lived?

"Are you excited for the school year?" Her mother asked as she waltzed into the room and sat at the table, her nose filling with the lovely breakfast smells. Pancakes and sausage, bacon and eggs, the sweet scent of syrup, all swam around her as she smiled at her lovely mother.

She had improved so much over the summer.

And the mystery as to why was not that hard to crack. Her stepfather had been away for nearly the entire summer. After two weeks of her normal private hell, he had boarded his ship and had been away for the rest of the summer.

Olivia and her mother had been able to spend every day together, walking through their little town to the beachfront, pick nicking in the park, even just sitting out in their front yard, soaking up the sun. Olivia had developed a little bit of a tan and her mother had taken on color.

And the lack of stress had allowed her mother to fill out her figure to what she had once been. A healthy weight. Her mother's stress was directly related to her eating habits and appetite. With her stepfather out to sea for so long, her mother's stress had diminished almost completely, so she had filled back out.

The biggest change, however, was in her mother's eyes. At the beginning of the summer they had been haunted, filled with shadows and doubt, sunken in anxiety. There had been deep shadows under her eyes from lack of restful sleep and their sparkle had been non-existent. Today, on Olivia's last day of the summer, they twinkled with a happiness that lit from within. All the shadows had been scared away by the summer of healing.

Looking at her now, she was the woman she had been before her stepfather, before her real father, before life had gotten in the way. She was young and beautiful, innocent and carefree.

As Olivia sat at the table eating breakfast and chatting idly with her mother about the coming school year, she was sad to see the summer ending. Olivia wasn't naive enough to believe that this would last. As soon as her stepfather returned things would go back to the way they had been. The added weight would melt off, the paler to her skin would slowly come back, and the shadows in her eyes would creep back in bit by bit.

But maybe this school year by herself, with the summer still fresh in her mind, her mother would be stronger, maybe this time she would be able to say no. Maybe this time she would be able to get away from this life. Maybe next summer, Olivia could be a normal kid again.

Shaking her head at her foolish thoughts, Olivia blinked down at her half eaten pancakes. At least this year she wouldn't be plagued by the constant thought of her mother's safety, wouldn't have to push it away with her studies. She would be able to focus like a normal kid. Maybe she would even be able to have friends this year, like the popular kids from her elementary school.

"Ready to go to the station?"

The ride to King's Cross was quick for Olivia. The scenery seemed to fly by as she thought of the year to come. She had read over her third year course books and it seemed to be very interesting. But she wanted to master her Lumos spell this year. After all, the master defensive spell plan could take a backseat right? Her mother wasn't in dire need this year as she had been last year. So she could afford to focus elsewhere.

Olivia, who knew her mother better then she knew herself, felt her attention snap into focus. "What is it?"

"It's your stepfather…"

And just like that all her peaceful feelings were gone. Her muscles began to tense, one by one, until she was sitting impossibly straight in the front seat of their beat up old car, her hands clenched into tight fists. Her jaw was working mechanically, a sawing motion back and forth, trying to hold in all the words that wanted to come spewing forth.

Was he already on his way back? How soon would he be arriving? It can't be that soon, certainly not today. Her mother would never risk her own safety in order to see her daughter onto the train. Or would she? Was Olivia destroying her mother's safety at this very second?

Spell after defensive spell, the ones she had been moments from dismissing entirely from her mind for the time being, came flooding back in and she found herself silently chanting them, picturing the wand movements in her mind over and over.

"He'll be away until just before you are returning from school this year. If you don't have any objections, I would like for you to come home for Christmas."

Relieve was an incredible flood. She felt her muscles go weak with the sudden release of tension and a smile spread across her mouth as the spells wandered away. Then came the happiness that was a slow fire growing through her limbs. And finally she was embracing her mother and shouting for glee.

"Of course I'll come home for Christmas!" Olivia belted out as she threw open her door and began to lug out her beat up trunk that she had shoved beneath her feet. Even if she had gained color over the summer, she hadn't gained much height. Her body had slimmed and filled slightly more into a woman's figure, but she remained just a little over five feet tall.

"I was certain you would say that, but I thought it best if I just ask," Olivia grabbed her mother's hand, swinging it as she walked into the station, and began to chatter feverishly about all the things she would do at school and how she would count down the very days until she would be able to come home for Christmas.

"And this year, I won't have to sit with the kids and the teachers at the table anymore! It is so awkward sometimes, so quiet. I never know what to say! Can we have mashed potatoes and cheesecake? Can we please?"

"Hello Olivia," came a voice that Olivia recognized. In fact, she had almost been waiting for it. What she hadn't been expecting was the way her mother squeezed her hand almost painfully, before quickly releasing and trying to step back. Olivia kept her mother's hand in her own and forced her to stay even with her.

"Hello Teddy. This is my mother," Olivia murmured in a steady voice as she looked to the side and saw Teddy Lupin standing just a few feet from her. He had grown several inches over the summer and now she had to tilt her head back quite a bit to see his face.

"Mom this is…" Olivia, who was about to introduce Teddy, turned to her mother and stopped her words in their tracks. She was staring at the Hogwarts train with an expression on her face that Olivia had never seen before. The blue eyes that they shared were huge, and nearly opaque, emotions that she couldn't begin to understand shining through. Tears were beginning to pool within the depths and she felt her heart squeeze painfully.

"Mom? What is it?" Olivia demanded, grabbing her mother's other hand and squeezing, until her mother dropped her eyes from the train to their mirror image. "Why are you looking that way?"

"No reason dear. Just… memories is all," she attempted a smile, but it faltered just the slightest. "Who is your friend here?"

"Teddy Lupin!" The high-pitched screech caused Olivia to wince and whip around to face the direction of the noise. Barreling through the crowd on the station came a force to be reckoned with. Five feet of solid emotion covered in a slim body and fiery red hair stormed up to Teddy Lupin and wrapped herself around him.

"Mom, this is Teddy, as you may have heard," Olivia said frowning slightly at the sight of the girl who continued to drape herself around the tall boy.

"Hello Teddy, and who's your friend?" Olivia continued to frown as the girl grabbed Teddy's hand and pulled it around her shoulders.

"I'm Victoire Weasley! And I'm gonna marry Teddy Lupin, just you wait and see!" the young girl shouted in an equally as loud voice. Really, Olivia thought as she stared at the girl, there was no reason to shout. She was standing right there, wasn't she? She was perfectly capable of hearing things said in a normal voice.

"Geeze Victoire, you're always so loud," Teddy grumbled as he shook off the girl's clinging grasp and offered his hand to Olivia's mother. "It's nice to meet you ma'am. Olivia and I are in the same year. She's very smart. Always willing to help others when they have questions."

"I'm smart too!" Victoire shouted and started to tug on Teddy's hand again. Olivia looked at her, a puzzled expression on her face. She had never encountered a creature quite like her before. She was loud and obnoxious. And from the glare she was currently giving Olivia, she was either extremely jealous of Teddy paying attention to others, or disliked her for some reason that wasn't obvious to her.

"Is this true Olivia? Are you living up to my dreams for you?" Her mother asked, drawing her attention away from the furious redheaded child. The hand that swept across her face was gentle, as was the smile that lit her mother's face.

"Of course mother," Olivia murmured and nestled her cheek into her mom's hand. "Always."

"I'm smarter then you I bet!" Victoire shouted again, breaking into the family moment. Olivia, disgruntled, turned back to the redhead and gave her an irritated frown. What was the girl's motivation? Didn't she realize that Olivia was two years ahead of her in school? That fact alone was cause to believe that she was smarter then Victoire. Even if she knew only that, it would be enough to discourage this kind of challenge.

"I'm sorry, but I don't believe you are," Olivia said sincerely. She heard her mother snort out a laugh and tug the slightest on her hand. She wanted to look to watch her mother laugh, but at that moment she was mesmerized by the change that over took the girl who had wrapped her arms completely around Teddy's waist.

Before Olivia's very eyes, the girl pushed away from Teddy and stepped forward, her hands fisting on her hips, her chin thrusting up and out. The effect was to make her seem a lot bigger then she actually was, but it was the fire that burst in her eyes that was the most fascinating. Olivia could literally see the anger smoldering there.

"I'll show you—"

"Come on Victoire. You best say goodbye to your parents," Teddy sighed with a pretty smile on his face. He pushed Victoire with a gentleness that got her headed away from Olivia. But as they wandered away, she saw the redhead look over her shoulder at her and glare.

"Oh dear, Livy. That was not very good," her mother said with more laughter, squeezing her hand some. "Do you always cause this much trouble at school?"

Before Olivia had a chance to ask what her mother meant by this, the whistle for the train blew. It was time to say goodbye.

Instantly tears sprang to into Olivia's eyes. Even knowing she was safe, even knowing that her mother would drive right home and be perfectly fine until Olivia would be able to return for Christmas, it was still hard to just leave. To just get on the train and not look back. Wouldn't her mother be lonely?

"Oh Livy hun, no. Don't do that," her mother said sadly as she crouched down to be level with Olivia. Wiping away her tears she pulled her close and Olivia pressed herself against the sudden softness in her once sharp-boned mother, smelt in deep that scent that was unique to her mother alone.

"I can't help it," Olivia said as she clutched at her mother, tight. She could hear the noise of other kids boarding the train, could feel them moving around her, possibly staring at her. But she couldn't help herself. Would this be the last time she ever had a moment like this with her mother?

"I'll see you in a few months, Liv. For Christmas remember?" but she didn't let go. She continued to rub her hand down Olivia's soft curls, continued to rock her gently back and forth.

"But what if it's never like this again?" Olivia whispered and closed her eyes tight against the tears. She felt her mother shudder and knew she had stepped too far. Though she thought about it constantly, they never spoke about it. Her mother knew where she stood on the issue, and Olivia knew that her mother would never change. Bringing it out into the open only made things worse.

"I'm sorry," Olivia said as she pulled away, pulled in her emotions. Contained herself. She forced a smile onto her face before she kissed both her mother's cheeks and grabbed her hands once more. "You're right, I will see you for Christmas."

"That's my girl. Study hard Olivia, for me. It's more important then you know," her mother whispered into her ear as she gave her one more hug. Then the final blow of the whistle and Olivia was on the train, dragging her one trunk behind her. And her mother was gone.

A quick check of the train compartments showed that they were all occupied, mostly with people she didn't know. She saw Victoire in one near the front of the train filled with other small children that looked to be first years like her.

As she moved further to the back, she was hoping she could find Teddy and slip into his compartment. After sharing hers for the past two years, it was the least he could do, right?

He was located in the second to last compartment, engrossed in conversation with his friends Dylan and Roger. Olivia's heart quickened as she went to knock on the door. What if he said no? What if she had to go find another seat? What if his friends laughed at her? Well…

It couldn't be any worse then seeing her mother with a blackened eye.

Instead of knocking, Olivia simply slid open the door to the compartment and stepped through. As she was opening her mouth to explain that she needed a place to sit, Teddy smiled at her and motioned to the seat beside him, which was closest to the window. With a slight pause in the conversation that continued once she was seated, Olivia sank into the seat and looked out the window at the passing landscape.

Had her mother left the station already? Was she driving home all alone? Was she beginning to stress again, about Olivia, about her stepfather, about life in general? The worry began to wiggle its way into her thoughts and Olivia caught herself chewing on her lip. There was no reason to worry. Logically, her mother was in the best possible situation at this point. Her stepfather was out to sea, and her daughter, her second biggest worry was off to school. She was set up to have the time of her life, relaxing and doing whatever she pleased. So Olivia had no reason to worry, right?

"So what did you think of my cousin?" Teddy asked, breaking into her thoughts.

"Your cousin?" Olivia asked, with another frown. She cocked her head to the side as she turned away from the window and back towards the occupants of the compartment. Roger was looking as chubby as ever, a bored expression on his face. He had never really liked her.

Dylan, who was more open to a girl's intrusion in the guy group, had also grown over the summer, which was hard to imagine, as he had been so tall already. Now he seemed to almost tower over her in her shorter height. He was watching her with a small smile on his face.

"Victoire," Dylan said with that same smile. He chuckled a little and shook his head. "I find her annoying. She's always talking about marriage and girl things. You are much more entertaining. Almost one of the boys."

Olivia frowned slightly at that statement, then shrugged it away. What sort of person had her mother been, when she was a girl? Had she been a girly girl? Or just one of the boys. What path had led her to where she was today? That thought was scary so Olivia focused in on the conversation again.

"Oh! You're cousin, Victoire. That you told me stories about. I hadn't put that together," Olivia contemplated out loud. Why hadn't she? She had heard several stories about the cousin, even more through the letters he had sent her over the summer. So why hadn't she been able to put two and two together. "I guess in the stories she just seemed so much more…"

"Likeable?" Dylan provided and Olivia found herself giving a small laugh. That was exactly it. The fact that he understood made her smile at him.

"Yes, that's it. She seemed so much nicer in the stories. A bit of a brat, but still nice enough to like. At the station, she was quite… challenging," Olivia admonished. Dylan was nodding as she spoke.

"Yeah. Did she say she was better then you about something? Every time I visit with Teddy she's always better then me. Better at Quidditch, better at telling jokes, better at spelling—"

"And she was that time to Dylan, remember? She got you on croquet!" Roger quipped with a laugh.

"I'd never heard that word before in my life! It's some Muggle thing. Besides, it's not the losing that's irritating. It's the fact that she feels the need to challenge everyone at every step. She's more annoying then my little sister." Dylan shook his head sadly.

Roger laughed. "That's true. I like your little sister. But Victoire—"

"She just wants people to like her!" Teddy broke in, rather angrily. For the first time that Olivia could remember, Teddy seemed to be agitated with her. She frowned at him, uncertain of where the emotions were coming from.

"I didn't say I didn't like her, Teddy," Dylan responded with a calmness in his voice, Olivia guessed it was to defuse the situation. The damage was done, however, and Olivia felt herself pulling away from the group. Anger was something she had learned to be wary of.

"Yeah, but you were making fun of her. There's nothing wrong with wanting to prove that you are worthy of being a person's friend, is there?" Teddy demanded, leaning forward in his seat intently. Dylan didn't say anything, and Olivia felt her fists clenching in her lap. She flinched as Teddy swung around to stare at her. "Is there?"

Unable to trust her voice just yet, Olivia shook her head slowly back and forth.

"Alright then. Can we drop it?"

"Yeah, sure. So…"

Dylan was looking at her, trying to signal her with his eyes that she should initiate a new conversation, but her jaw was glued shut. He looked away from her to Roger, who seemed just as unable to bring up a new topic.

Teddy let out a frustrated breath and sat back in the seat, his head hitting the back with a thud. Olivia jumped and flinched again before sliding as casually as she could away from him, backing herself into a corner. She knew it was foolish, knew that Teddy wasn't in the position to abuse her the way her stepfather did her mother. But everyone started somewhere right?

Though she didn't believe that Teddy was going to lash out at her in the next minute, or even at any point during the trip, she knew that letting her guard down for even a moment was the worst mistake she could make. How many times had her mother let down her guard before it had been too late?

"So what classes are you taking Olivia?" Dylan threw out, obviously desperate to eliminate the awkward silence. It took a bit of work, but she managed to unstick her jaw.

"The usual, as well as Arithmancy. You?"

"Same! Roger wanted me to take Divination, but I don't think I can stomach that. How are your grades in potions?" He smiled at her, relief apparent in his eyes. Obviously he found Teddy's outburst as strange as she did.

"Well enough. I can follow the course material—"

"Don't be modest!" Roger interrupted, a snide smirk on his face. "Professor Windell was blabbing at the end of the year that you were possibly the next potions prodigy. It was sickening. All the teachers feel that way."

"Roger, that's mean. She can't help it if she's smart. She's Ravenclaw after all," Teddy said and smiled at her once again. Olivia felt herself softening back up, but she hadn't forgotten his anger and nor would she.

"The reason I ask," Dylan broke in, trying to gain back control of the conversation, "is that my mother was not happy with my end of term grades. She wants me to improve and I just don't see how I can. Would you be willing to tutor me?"

Olivia was taken aback by the question. Sure, she had helped her fellow students in the past when they had had questions. But she had never actually tutored someone. She wasn't sure if she would be good at it. And what about her private spells that she wanted to practice? What about Lumos and all the defensive spells?

"I mean, you don't have to, if you're worried about your own studies," Dylan stammered, worried that he had over stepped his bounds. Olivia gave him a slight smile as she thought about it. She had already decided that she was going to put the defensive spells on the back burner for this year. But she really wanted to finish Lumos. It had been nearly perfected by the end of last year. How much tutoring could he need?

"I suppose I can. The first few weeks are all about catching up, refreshing on last year. But when things start to get rough, you can find me and ask for my help, I suppose. I've never tutored before, but I'll help you any way I can."

"What if I need help?" Teddy demanded, a petulant look on his face. Olivia decided something was wrong with Teddy today. They had been passing letters back and forth for the entire summer, and last year he had acted so different towards her! Why was he being like this now? First with the unexpected anger, now with the looks and the demanding of attention. It was slightly irritating.

"Do you need help in any subjects?" Olivia asked diplomatically. Teddy was, in a way, her friend. The least she could do was offer him the same opportunities as she had Dylan.

"Well, not at the moment no. But what if I do later?" He gave a loud sigh and leaned back against the seat. Yes, something was definitely bothering him today.

"You can come find me too, Teddy," Olivia said, touching his hand for the briefest of moments before pulling her own back into her lap and clenching them tight. "I'm usually in the library."

Teddy smiled at her and the crisis was over. Conversation took a more normal turn and the entire atmosphere of the compartment relaxed. As the train zoomed towards the school and the talk became a background noise, Olivia kept thinking one thing.

Third year was definitely going to be different.

A/n Sorry it took so long! Review me.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven:

Third year was indeed different. Within the first few weeks of classes, Dylan began to come to her in the library for tutoring in potions. Mostly he had trouble understanding the portion and ingredients and he had trouble remembering what ingredient did what and what pairings made which reaction.

At first she tried making a chart of the different common ingredients and their pairings and outcomes. But the chart had been confusing, even to her, and there had been so many different aspects to the chart that she had gotten lost halfway through. Obviously, this had not been the right way to approach the problem.

Her second try at the tutoring was more successful. She asked Dylan how he approached his potions homework and then she compared it to how she approached it. Finally she asked him what his strengths were in his studies and developed a new plan.

Since he was exceptionally good at math, Olivia began to change the way he thought of potions. Not as a blur of information that he didn't understand, but as a math problem. Unicorn hair plus toadstool equaled the basis to a shrinking potion. And so on. He began to pick it up and start to use the tools on his own without her prompting.

After the first few sessions, Teddy began to come with him too, though he didn't often ask for help. Mostly Teddy just sat with them in the library to do his homework in quiet, away from his adoring fans.

He had been accepted onto his house's Quidditch team as keeper and was once again the center of an adoring fan club. Though in classes and in the hallways, he seemed to revel in all the attention as most boys his age would, the reality of it was he didn't necessarily enjoy the attention all the time. More often then not he would ditch the fawning girls to sit in the library with Dylan and herself.

Sometimes Victoire would make an appearance in the library as well. Olivia didn't like those days as much because Victoire often started an argument with her. She was always challenging Olivia, saying she was better at things that she really wasn't better at. When this happened, she felt it was her responsibility to prove Victiore wrong, so things were never pleasant on those days. Mostly, when Victoire waltzed into the library to hang all over Teddy, Olivia left soon after.

The absence of her library brought Olivia to a slight dilemma. Where was she to study if the library was gone? She soon became quite good at finding unoccupied classrooms and making them her own. There was one particular room on the fifth floor, underneath the astronomy tower that was hardly ever in use, mostly because of the draft that came through.

Olivia found this classroom to be ideal for her studies, and her extracurriculars. Her progress on Lumos was almost complete. She had been able to modify the spell so that not only did it light the tip of her wand, it also had the added effect of allowing her eyes to see light when there was none. It was almost like night vision goggles, but the magical version. The spell would be complete when she was able to shut off the light at the end of her wand, but keep the ability to see the light.

Professor Flitwick, who had showed her when she arrived on the first day of class her modified spell newly published, had asked after her studies and had inquired about any more modifications she had been working on. Olivia had filled him in on her Lumos idea and the progress she had made, and while he found it fascinating, he had no advice on how to help. Modifications were beyond him.

The days to Christmas were getting fewer and fewer and Olivia found herself actually excited for the holiday. She had missed her mother terribly and couldn't wait to see her again.

It was during the week before Christmas that things came to a head between herself and Victoire. At first, Olivia had argued with Victoire, proving her wrong often. But then she had seen how it distressed Teddy, for he was a friend to both of them. She hadn't wanted to cause him any unnecessary worry or force him to pick sides, so Olivia had soon switched to trying to keep the peace. But that day was different.

It started in the library like it always seemed to. Teddy was sitting across from Olivia, studying quietly from his transfiguration book, writing an essay. Olivia and Dylan were talking every now and then about random things that he asked about while she monitored his potions essay.

Things were calm and relaxed until that force of energy that was Victoire strode into the room and took a seat beside Teddy, demanding his attention. The very thought of Victoire in a library was a cause for Olivia to wince. She was loud and obnoxious, often disturbing the other occupants of the room, especially when Teddy tried his hardest to ignore her. Today was one of those days.

"Teddy! Are we going to sit together on the train ride back home?" Victoire demanded as she pushed at the stack of books Olivia had made to help Dylan with his essay, causing them to topple and lose their order. Blowing out a frustrated breath, Olivia reached for the books and began stacking them again.

"I don't know Victoire. We'll see," Teddy said grumpily, pushing at the shaggy brown hair that was falling into his eyes.

"Why don't you want to sit by me? It's not like we're getting off at different stops! We're going to the same place," Victoire huffed and slammed down her book in the newly made space. Next came her bag, shoving for more room and toppling the half stacked pile Olivia had been working on. Seeing this, Dylan began to help with the stacking too.

"I don't know if I'm going back for Christmas or not this year. I didn't the last two, I'm considering staying here again," Teddy snapped as he handed Olivia one of the toppled books with an apologetic smile.

"Well if you're staying then I'm staying too!" Victoire proclaimed as she dug through her messy book bag, looking for parchment to work on. "I'll go wherever you go Teddy, cuz we're gonna be married someday."

Teddy made a non-committal sound and went back to his writing. Her stacks once more complete, Olivia did as well. The potions essay was mostly finished, but she wanted to look up some history of the shrinking potion. She wondered if she could derive the formula for an enlargement potion by learning the history of how the shrinking was discovered. It was basically an inverse right? So if she created a formula that caused the exact opposite reaction to that of the shrinking potion, would she make the enlargement potion? It would be an interesting experiment.

Olivia was just finding the necessary information when Victoire's voice interrupted once again. "What about you Dylan? Are you staying here for Christmas also? Teddy said you stayed behind before. Are you going to again?"

"No," Dylan said gamely, wanting to prove to Teddy that he liked his cousin, since that incident on the train. "I'm going home. Have to show my mom how much I've improved in potions." At this he turned and smiled at Olivia. "Will I see you on the train Olivia? Perhaps I can introduce my mom to you at the station."

"We'll see," Olivia said, a little disconcerted by the fact that Dylan wanted his mom to meet her. She really hadn't helped that much with his potions. She had only changed the way he looked at it. He was the one that did all the work, really. "I am going home for Christmas this year, but I'm not sure how long we'll be at the station. My mother tends to be sickly this time of year."

"So you'll be going home as well?" Teddy asked with sudden interest. Olivia smiled at him, letting her excitement at seeing her mom shine through. "Are you glad for the change this year?"

"Wait…" Victoire broke in before Olivia could answer. "You stayed behind the last two years also?"

"Victoire, don't be nosey!" Teddy said with a hint of aggravation. It seemed he was always getting frustrated with her lately, Olivia noticed. But how could he not? Victoire followed him almost everywhere. She was always waiting for him outside his classrooms, she always sat next to him at meal times. Olivia guessed that in the common rooms she wasn't far behind either. Where Teddy was, Victoire was too.

"It's alright Teddy, I don't mind," Olivia said, though she did mind. What was it to her what Olivia chose to do for Christmas? Still, she too remembered the incident on the train and didn't want to put a strain on the closest thing she had to friendship. With a gentle smile the lie rolled easily off her tongue. "Like I said, my mother takes ill often during this time of year. The past two years she was unable to get to the station so I stayed here for Christmas. This year is different. And yes, Teddy, I am glad for the change."

"I would be too," Teddy said to her with a teasing smile on his face. "Your mother is pretty!"

"Is she now?" Dylan demanded, jumping back into the conversation. "Do you look anything like her Olivia?"

"Just the eyes," Teddy told Dylan, who shared the teasing smile. "They have mirror blue eyes, big and wide, that seem to see for miles. A boy could get lost in your mother's eyes."

Then it happened, the thing that sent their peaceful little library evenings exploding forever. Victoire, in her bid for attention and to be liked by the others, said rather loudly, "I bet my mom is better then yours."

Olivia watched, as if in slow motion, as the smiles dropped from the boy's faces. Both turned simultaneously to stare at Victoire as if she had crossed an invisible line, broken an unspoken rule.

"Excuse me?" Olivia whispered, feeling as if the breath had been knocked from her. What was happening here? For once in her life she couldn't see the logic in this conversation, couldn't pinpoint what the goal was for Victoire, or how she was going to come out of it unscathed.

"I said I bet my mom is better then yours. My mother is Hermoine Granger. She helped defeat the Dark Lord. She's best friends with Harry Potter, you know, the boy who lived? Who's your mom?" Victoire demanded, her face smug with supposed triumph.

"Victoire—" Teddy tried to intervene.

"No it's true! What has your mother done that's more accomplished then mine?" Victoire demanded.

Thousands of instants crossed Olivia's mind that were more important to her then helping defeat a man that had never touched her life. More important then being friends with a boy, who did indeed do extraordinary things, but not on his own, not by his own strengths. Had Victoire's mother ever given up her own happiness, her own safety so her daughter could buy school supplies? Had Hermoine ever faced a personal demon day in and day out and still managed to smile?

"I—" Olivia started but was cut off.

"Your mother is weak," Victoire began.

"Victoire!" Teddy snapped, trying to make her stop.

"No Teddy. I heard mom and your grandma talking at the lake this summer. I know what kind of home life Olivia comes from. I know about the bruises and things. If her mother was as great as mine, wouldn't she have gotten her daughter out of that situation?"

"Victoire, that is enough!" Teddy shouted, standing and slamming his hands down on the table. While the others flinched and heads turned to stare at the commotion, Olivia looked forward steadily, staring straight at Victoire.

Though her words wounded, ripped, and tore through everything that Olivia had once believed, though they raised numerous questions that Olivia couldn't even begin to comprehend or answer, she knew that letting her fear show was the number one mistake. She kept her face calm and her eyes focused and tear free.

"I want you to leave right now, Victoire. What you said is unacceptable." Teddy seethed as he began to pack away Victoire's things, shoving books and parchments violently into her pack. Quietly, Olivia began to shuffle her things into order as well.

It was as she slowly stacked her papers that she was dealt another blow. They knew. Teddy and Dylan, maybe the whole school. They knew about her home life, about the abuse. Teddy wasn't such a shock, but Dylan? And Victoire, who had a huge mouth. They all knew.

Though it hurt, she couldn't let it show. Wouldn't.

"No Teddy, it's quite alright. Though Victoire has many valid points she's missing out on just one thing." Olivia opened her scraggily book bag and began to stuff her things inside, balancing the weight to put the least amount of strain on the threads that kept it together.

"And what is that may I ask?" Victoire demanded, smiling that smug little smile, thinking she had beat Olivia at some game. How could she possibly be unaware of the fact that her words were sharper then swords? "Did I forget to mention how my mother would never be in such a position? Even if she hadn't married my father, even if she had made the same bad choices as yours and had found herself with a man that hit her, she would figure a way out. Did I mention that she is an accomplished witch, the smartest of her generation?"

More wounds. But Olivia was prepared with a single bullet that would blow a hole right through Victoire's front. "No, not that."

Calmly closing the flap of her bag and shouldering it, Olivia stood and tucked her chair gently into the table. Then, with her shoulders squared and her head held level Olivia looked Victoire square in the eye. "It's not that my mother is weak Victoire. It's that she's infinitely strong. There are things about our situation that you are unaware of, aspects that keep us where we are. But know this. Everyday my mother fights a hell deeper and darker then anything your mother could imagine. And she survives. More then that, she lives. What has your mother done lately?"

The silence that followed was an empty victory. Olivia felt hollow inside, the questions mounting. She needed to leave, needed to be alone. Needed to consider what Victoire said, for though it was done in anger and out of spite, she had been right.

"Dylan, if you need any more help, I'll be in the Ravenclaw common room for a little while longer. Goodnight."

And then she was gone, out in the hallway, scurrying away, her shoulders hunching under the weight of questions and the tears that built but didn't spill.

* * *

The return trip to King's Cross station for Christmas was uneventful. Mostly it was spent with Olivia staring vacantly out into the countryside, going over the questions in her head. Since the showdown in the library, Olivia's hurt had turned into a slow burning anger, anger like she had never felt before. She did indeed have so many questions that she needed to ask her mother.

As she stepped off the train and into her mother's arms, her happiness wasn't what she had hoped it would be. Though her mother squeezed her tight and demanded that she be informed of everything that had happened since she set foot on the train in September, Olivia had trouble reciprocating those feelings.

Victoire's voice was still in her head.

Why hadn't her mother walked away yet? If she loved Olivia as much as she said she did, as much as she seemed to show, how could she still be with her stepfather? If she really loved her, how could she let her daughter stay in an environment that was hazardous?

The holiday went by quickly, and though she tried to be her old self, she couldn't help watching her mother, calculating what she went through every day when her stepfather was here, pitting it against the amount of strength she appeared to have, and demanding of herself why they were still here. By all calculations, her mother should have escaped long ago.

Christmas day took away some of the focus. Her mother had gotten her more school supplies, something she was always grateful for, as well as a very pretty black dress. It was sophisticated, with a V-neck collar and a very tight bodice that came to her hips before flaring out slightly. The pleated skirt stopped short of her knees and when paired with knee high boots, she looked a lot older then she was. Her mother said so when she tried it on.

"You're growing into such a lovely young woman," her mother had whispered, tears in her eyes. "It's hard to imagine that in just a few months you'll be fourteen."

"It's hard to imagine a lot of things," Olivia had snapped back and watched a knowing look enter her mother's eye. She hated being this way with her mother, but she had stood by for too long.

She turned and opened her final present to get away from the awkward silence with her mother. It was another mystery gift. Inside a rather large box was a new book bag. Made of tough canvas dyed a dark brown, it had an adjustable strap and more pockets then she could imagine. It was also spelled to hold more weight then any bag she had ever owned. In a fun test, she had stuffed all her books into the bag as well as all her new supplies, something she had never been able to do with her old bag. Upon slipping it over her shoulder, it felt as if it was empty.

Christmas dinner was a fine affair, sitting in the living room before the fire, listening to carols on the radio. Her mother had made mashed potatoes and cheesecake, just as Olivia had asked for. And though they were delicious, they settled badly within her stomach.

The time for asking questions was getting closer. The longer she was with her mother, the more questions she needed to ask. But she was hesitant, because it was something she wasn't allowed to talk about. Talking about this issue was the number one thing she had forbidden herself.

Like the time at the station when she had asked, "what if it's the last time it's ever like this?" and had immediately had to back peddle to keep her mother happy. She had always tried to keep her mother happy because she did face so much hardship. But what if keeping her mother happy was hindering her? What if protecting her was only making it worse?

The day before it was time to return to Hogwarts, her mother finally got tired of Olivia's attitude. Sitting in the living room reading her transfiguration book without actually seeing the words, her mother broke the silence.

"What's wrong Livy dear?" She demanded quietly as she set down the book she had been reading and stared intently at her mother's face.

"What do you mean?" Olivia played coy, trying to push this away. She didn't want to hurt her mother, she really didn't. But it was becoming inevitable.

"You haven't been acting yourself at all since you got back from school. Did something happen in a class? With the students? You can talk to me dear. I'm your mother. I'll listen," she said it with a little smile, trying to earn her trust. And that was the trigger that opened the floodgates.

"What's gonna happen when he gets back from sea?" Olivia demanded, closing her book with a snap. It wasn't how she had planned to start, that was for sure. She had wanted to ease into, maybe give her some options to get out. Not just demand answers.

"What?" her mother whispered, devastated. That was certainly not what she had been expecting.

"He's been gone for the summer and for Christmas, and you've gotten so healthy! Look at you, you've put on weight, you're getting sleep, color. You're smiling! How can you let him come back when he's just going to take that all away?"

"You don't know what you are talking about Olivia," Her mother stammered. She began to fidget, twisting her fingers, chewing at her lip.

"Don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about, Mother." Olivia seethed, infuriated, throwing the book to the floor and standing. "You think I don't see what he does to you? You think I watch him hitting you and abusing you and I don't hurt too? I hate him, I hate the way he treats you, the things he does to you!"

She paced towards the fire, then away, the silence so loud between them. "I'm sick to death of coming between you and his fists. Of sneaking you into my room while the cops bang on the door. Of hiding away my bruises. Do you know what people think of me at school mother?"

"I—"

"They ask me why my mother is so weak, she can't walk away from the thing that's hurting her the most. I have to lie and say you have a sickness and that's why I can't come home for Christmas. They ask me where my bruises come from, and I lie and say things that they know aren't true. Or I say nothing at all and it's worse."

"I know that's no way to live a childhood, Livy dear, but it's for the best."

"For the best?" Olivia shouted, turned to face her mother as she stood in the middle of the room, rage striking down her body like lightening. "For the best? How is watching you fight to stay alive every day that he is here for the best? How. Why can't you just walk away from him?" Olivia pleaded.

"There are things you don't know, Olivia," now she was pulling back in her chair, trying to create a distance, from her daughter or the situation, Olivia wasn't sure.

"Then tell me! So I can understand. You said yourself, I'm growing up. I'm more intelligent then you are giving me credit for. Tell me what's going on so I can help. You don't have to leave him on your own, mother. I'm here, I'll be your support."

"But you're gone Olivia, at school."

"So?" She demanded. Stalking the few feet between them, Olivia fell to her knees before her mother, grabbing her hands and begging for understanding. "Are you really that lonely for company that a man who uses you as his punching bag is better then being alone? Why do you need him, mother?"

"There are things you don't realize Olivia. It's not as easy to walk away as you think. What about the house? I own it. I can't just leave it behind. It's our home."

"We can make a new home," she was pleading now, her voice thick with tears. "We can build a new home somewhere else, somewhere safe. Don't you see what this is doing to me? To us?"

"With what money, Olivia? I haven't had a job since before you were born. Your stepfather supports us both. How can I run from him when he keeps us afloat?"

"You can get a job. I can to!" she offered, hope in finding the solution. "Over the summer. I can help with the bills. I'm almost old enough. I can almost pass off as sixteen."

"What about when you go back to school? What if something happens to me while you are at school, something bad, and I can't support you or myself when you get back? Then what'll we do?"

"I'll quit school then. I'll—"

"No!" Her mother shouted, shaking off Olivia's clinging grasp, getting to her feet and striding towards the fire. "You will not quit school, Olivia. I forbid it. School is your one option, your one chance. I…"

She fell silent and Olivia felt the anger that had slipped from her grasp running back. How could her mother be so helpless? Victoire had been right. Her mother was weak. If she were strong like Hermoine Granger, she would have gotten away, would have escaped. Would have kept her daughter safe.

"Despite what you see when you are home, I need your stepfather. And he needs me. I will not leave him. I will not leave this house. And I will not put you in a position where you have no chance at a better life," though her voice had faltered in the beginning, it grew stronger at the end, a promise she intended to keep.

But Olivia was still so mad. None of her questions had been answered, none of her concerns had been addressed. Her mother had brushed them away as if they meant nothing, as if she meant nothing. Never before had she felt so betrayed by her mother, so hurt. The anger was nearly overwhelming.

Coming to her feet Olivia strode towards the door, but stopped before leaving the room. With her back to her mother she said quite clearly into the silence, "Any life would be better then one where a mother is too weak to walk away from the one thing that's hurting her daughter."


End file.
